Here’s the quote most often heard from people discussing plans for retirement: "One of the main things I plan to do when I retire is TRAVEL." If you have followed me long enough or simply know me well, you are familiar with the four areas of non-financial retirement I discuss, preach, talk about, and emphasize that are necessary to prepare for retirement: mental, physical, social, and spiritual. Today I’m writing this column while traveling abroad, and I dedicate it to all of you who are saying, "One of the main things I plan to do |
| (This scene is real, from Como, Italy, 2023.) |  |
(This really happened to me.) Seven minutes later, the station is in sight. But so are the three flights of steps to get to the station! If you are in shape, this Sisyphusian* challenge for you and your new four-wheeled friend that now includes several treasured souvenirs might just be manageable. Make sure you are physically fit!
Those are four very good reasons that I always ask you about physical fitness as you prepare for retirement. Travel is exciting, educational, interesting, and fun. It may be harder today, but when you are physically fit, you will be better prepared to handle ‘stuff’ that can happen. I wish everyone a fun summer full of friends, family, adventure and very few travel challenges.
BON VOYAGE!
Loretta
*In Greek mythology Zeus punished Sisyphus by forcing him to roll a boulder up a hill for eternity.
P.S. I’d love to hear your travel stories and how glad you were to have physically prepared for the challenges and the fun.
Tell me: loretta@coachingwithloretta.com
*In Greek mythology Zeus punished Sisyphus by forcing him to roll a boulder up a hill for eternity.
P.S. I’d love to hear your travel stories and how glad you were to have physically prepared for the challenges and the fun.
Tell me: loretta@coachingwithloretta.com
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I’ve always said that in life one thing we can surely count on is change. Sometimes we can plan for it and sometimes it is thrust upon us. Sometimes we’ve grown older and wiser, and sometimes we’ve simply become bored. Consider:
RELATIONSHIPS, COLLEGE, MARRIAGE, PARENTING, EMPTY NESTERS, CHANGING JOBS, RETIREMENT!
When facing a change, we often say, “Well, it’s a transition. Change offers challenges, adventure, and an opportunity to grow.” All that is true, but the words ‘change’ and ‘transition’ have two different meanings. Here’s the difference:
- Change refers to the need to move away from the way things used to be to the way they are now.
- Transition is the psychological process we go through to adapt to the change.
To quote the author William Bridges, “Without transition, change is just a rearrangement of the furniture.”
Think about that for a moment. Now, think about how it relates to Retirement. Transition requires a psychological process to have a successful change.
There are three stages to TRANSITION:
Stage 1: Accepting the Ending – Long Goodbye
Ok, so you have left work. You must accept the fact that your days will be different. You will no longer have the structure, calendar and organization you had before. Where you spend your day, and who you will be with will change.
Ok, so you have left work. You must accept the fact that your days will be different. You will no longer have the structure, calendar and organization you had before. Where you spend your day, and who you will be with will change.
Stage 2: Living in the Neutral Zone – Messy Middle
Yes, you read that correctly. Accepting a Messy Middle is an important mindset to
have. Realizing that things really are different and that it will take time to figure out what you really want and how you will find your purpose to feel satisfied can be a bit uncomfortable (and messy) in the short term.
Yes, you read that correctly. Accepting a Messy Middle is an important mindset to
have. Realizing that things really are different and that it will take time to figure out what you really want and how you will find your purpose to feel satisfied can be a bit uncomfortable (and messy) in the short term.
Stage 3: Reaching Your New Beginning
Take a victory lap! You have figured it out, so find comfort in this new beginning. You also can relax because you realize that you can tweak it along the way as you experience the many new adventures you have been curious about.
Take a victory lap! You have figured it out, so find comfort in this new beginning. You also can relax because you realize that you can tweak it along the way as you experience the many new adventures you have been curious about.
Those are the facts. If you jump from Stage 1 directly to Stage 3, you may find yourself very unhappy. Spend some time in Stage 2 (the Messy Middle) so you can really enjoy that victory lap!
I leave you with the words of Dr. Seuss:
Let me know if you need a little help.
Loretta
Loretta
Episode 7 of Resources for a Modern Retirement is about the importance of physical fitness in retirement, of course, and at all times in life.
Join us as Mary Cady Bolin gives insight into her classes (at the Y) and how all levels of fitness are welcome. She shares how people should try out an instructor two or three times before making a decision to accept or join the class. Needless to say, the purpose of this episode is to encourage regular physical activity to support physical and emotional health, a key component in any retirement plan!
About our Episode Guest
 | Mary Cady Bolin |
1. GUESS WHAT Number ... "Retirement" is on the list of 'Life's 43 most stressful life events'.
It’s #10! And that’s why I say we need to talk about your plans. Some people might find the transition easy, but many retirees are truly stressed at the challenge of creating a new identity and purpose.
2. GUESS WHAT … it might mean if your work defines “who you are” rather than “what you do.”
It will make leaving your workplace more difficult. Think about how you will introduce yourself when you retire, and please don’t say ‘I used to be!’ Thinking about who you are NOW and what you want NOW will help you create the things you will be retiring TO.
3. GUESS WHAT … will happen if your social connections are mostly related to your workplace.
It will probably be a lot harder to replace those connections. Finding new friends and interests before you leave your job will create a ready community of people you like to spend time with when you do retire.
By the way, a Harvard Grant Study has shown that having a strong social connection in retirement not only helps people outlive those who don’t but also aids in delaying the onset of Alzheimer’s and dementia.
By the way, a Harvard Grant Study has shown that having a strong social connection in retirement not only helps people outlive those who don’t but also aids in delaying the onset of Alzheimer’s and dementia.
4. GUESS WHAT … sitting at a desk most of the day can cause.
Complicated physical issues that can interfere with your retirement plans. Get up and get moving! Those grandkids want to play hide and seek. Your condo wants you to be on the pickleball team, and the dog just brought you his leash asking for a long walk. You don’t want to miss out on any of that – do you?
5. GUESS WHAT … believing that “the best is yet to come” can encourage.
Fresh ideas and possibilities! Having a positive mental outlook is not just being a cockeyed optimist. It helps you deal with change as well as giving you more energy for new opportunities and accomplishments. It also makes you more resilient so you can more easily handle the other ‘stuff’ that comes your way.
6. GUESS WHAT happens … when volunteering is what you want to do in retirement, but you don’t spend any time looking into it beforehand.
You will probably waste time searching for appropriate opportunities and get stuck in roles you don’t like. Start early thinking about organizations you want to help and make some inquiries.
Think about what you would like to do for an organization, so you don’t get stuck making phone calls or stuffing envelopes (unless, of course, you like that!).
Think about what you would like to do for an organization, so you don’t get stuck making phone calls or stuffing envelopes (unless, of course, you like that!).
AND BY THE WAY… one more
7. GUESS WHAT happens … when you WRITE DOWN goals you want to achieve.
Whether it’s a trip to Machu Picchu or creating an online creative cooking club, you will be more likely to achieve your goal if it is WRITTEN DOWN. (You’ve probably already done it on the financial side. Now do the same for all those non-financial issues!)
Research has shown that when goals are written down, it reminds us of what they are and what we need to do to achieve them. Just make sure you put the list in a place where you can easily find it.
Research has shown that when goals are written down, it reminds us of what they are and what we need to do to achieve them. Just make sure you put the list in a place where you can easily find it.
No more guessing. Having a little extra information makes you smarter. Now you have it, so get started!
Loretta
Loretta
Episode 6 of Resources for a Modern Retirement breaks down the 9 keys to true wealth and planning for your future self.
Where do you want to be in ten years? In today's podcast, join Eric J. Weigel and me, as we navigate how to plan for your future self. Retirement is about more than just money, as Eric identifies in his book, Reimaging Retirement - 9 Keys to True Wealth.
Learn about the 9 keys to true wealth and focusing on all areas of your life that are important to you!
Learn about the 9 keys to true wealth and focusing on all areas of your life that are important to you!
About Our Episode Guest
 | Eric J. Weigel Founder Retire with Possibilities https://www.retirewithpossibilities.com/ eweigel@retirewithpossibilities.com BUY THE BOOK: Reimaging Retirement - 9 Keys to True Wealth |
While traveling recently, I was introduced to someone from Brazil. When I told him I was a Life Coach with a specialty in Retirement, he was intrigued. The conversation went something like this:
He: Interesting. I recently watched a documentary about retirement in the U.S. If you don’t mind, I have a question.
Me: Sure, go ahead and ask.
He: Well, one thing really surprised me. Is it true when a person retires in the U.S., they are assigned a LEGAL GUARDIAN?
Me: Sure, go ahead and ask.
He: Well, one thing really surprised me. Is it true when a person retires in the U.S., they are assigned a LEGAL GUARDIAN?
A Legal Guardian at Retirement? No!
Needless to say, I was surprised. Perhaps the film dealt with financial planning or offered other suggestions for protecting one’s assets during retirement. Somehow, he had come away with a very strange conclusion.
Note: Many people in the U.S. take legal steps to assign Power of Attorney to a family member or trusted friend as part of their Estate Planning. This gives that person the legal authority to care for the personal and property interests of someone who has become physically or mentally impaired.
A legal guardian is similar in nature, but the guardian is assigned through an extensive court proceeding rather than through the wishes of the individual. Obviously, neither is an automatic factor of retirement.
Guard Against the Dark Side
What I did not share with him - and what I really don’t like to linger on here because our focus in these pages is the power of positivity – is the fact that after retiring some people do experience the dark side of retirement. Simply put, the dark side of retirement has to do with feeling lost, useless, depressed, and simply without validation. Sitting in the house all day with little to do is very boring and lonely; the spiraling down can even lead to exploring the liquor cabinet.
For some, the lack of purpose that comes with retirement is very hard and finding the positive can be difficult and they can no longer handle their own affairs. If you or anyone you know is experiencing depression or having trouble shifting a negative mindset, I encourage reaching out to a good therapist or consulting with your primary care physician. There is help!
Focus on the Bright Side
Happily, what most people can look forward to is the bright side of retirement!
And, indeed, there is a bright side – time to do the things you really enjoy, opportunities for creative and exciting adventures, satisfaction of embracing the new and nurturing the tried and true. It involves PLANNING, and there are a few simple things you can do now to make YOUR future look bright.
Step One: PHYSICAL
Start now to build an exercise routine. This does not require a gym membership or a Lulu Lemon outfit. If you are new at it, start with 10 minutes and watch yourself build up to 30.
Step Two: MENTAL
Set your mind to being more positive every day. Make things happen. What are you are really good at and enjoy doing? Spend a little time starting up again. (Photography? Learning a language? Volunteer?)
Step Three: SOCIAL
Make sure your friends and social connections are not all associated with your work. You’ll have new friends thanks to step two! And…, get rid of negativity. If relationships are hard to break, try to interact less often.
Step Four: SPIRITUAL
This is not an edict for religion. Instead find time to bring significance to your daily routine. How can you contribute? How can you feel satisfied? Oh yes, and perform a random act of kindness every day.
That’s it. I’ve tried to make it short and sweet. Whether you are following these suggestions yourself or if you are a Power of Attorney or a Legal Guardian trying to help the person in your care, working through these four steps is bound to lead to positive and impactful benefits in the years ahead.
Loretta
Loretta
Author
Loretta Saff, M.A., CPC, CPRC
As an active writer, both nationally and internationally, Loretta Saff's humor columns, blog, and lifestyle articles reflect an insight in dealing with situations that helps people get to their core issues and encourage confidence, trust and support.
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