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Well, I knew it was bound to happen. The combined stress caused by the perfect storm of Halloween and COVID -19 together has brought a lot of requests for my services as a Life/Retirement/Transition Coach. This time, I immediately thought the answer was group coaching. Normally, I don’t share information about clients, but in order to help you understand that we need to reach out and help each other, I have obtained releases from anyone involved in this note. Last week I held a group session with five attendees. Each had their own issues, and each was truly concerned. I’m sure you will recognize them: Wanda, the Witch Cornelia, the Candy Corn Casper, the Friendly Ghost Terry, the Tarantula Peter, the Pumpkin I asked each in turn “What is going on?” and here are their answers:
SLAM! There I was, face flat into the treeI gave her a questioning look. “I was on my broom and one of my earbuds fell out. I had to look down to retrieve it - and SLAM! There I was, face flat into the tree. I heard people laughing! Why didn’t my radar warn me about the tree? Am I getting too old? Should I retire?” Cornelia: She spoke softly and made eye contact with each member of the group. “Look, as early as the 1880s I became popular. My three colorful layers are attractive, and I’m small and easy to eat.” She teared up. Ok, Ok, I guess I should just retire - right? “At least I WAS easy to eat. I’m the most fun to eat by the handful! And, I mean, really, with COVID-19 people don’t want to eat anything by the handful!” She started to sob. “I’m fat free and keep in the refrigerator for up to 9 months, but nobody really wants me now... Ok, Ok, I guess I should just retire – right?” Casper was next. Casper: "Yeah, it’s not rocket science. You all know me – you know me by my full name, ‘Casper the Friendly Ghost.'" He started to smile a little, and then the smile faded.  “That’s right; I’m a non-conformist. I’d rather make friends than scare people. I know I’m different from the rest of the haunt team, but it is who I am. I like people; I’ve made friends before. I don’t like scaring them.” Wanda started to snicker. “Whoever heard of a friendly ghost?” she muttered. I had to shhh! her. “And now there is COVID-19,” Casper continued. “People can’t even be with their regular friends, so you can bet no one wants to talk to a friendly ghost! What should I do? I have a lot of years ahead of me!” Then it was Terry’s turn. Terry: “Ha – you think you guys have issues? You think you don’t know what to do ‘next’? When I was a little tiny tarantula, my Mama told me I was cute. Then I left the nest, and it all ended.” He looked around, daring people to challenge him.  He looked around, daring people to challenge him.“I remember the first time I became aware of Halloween! Look around, guys! Do you notice how many phony spiders people put out – on the lawn/on the bushes/crawling up the front of the house! THEY ARE ALL TARANTULAS! What do you think this does to my self-image?” Everyone got quiet. “I know, I crawl; I have long hairy legs, and I have eight eyes. But I’m harmless to people! If I bite, it’s no worse than a bee sting – okay? Look it up! So, what’s a young guy like me to do with a reputation like that?” Wanda started muttering again. “Maybe you remind people of the COVID virus,” she whispered. I talked over her. “Ok, Peter, it’s your turn.” "Let's face it, the pumpkin is the |
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Remember when the only time we talked about ZOOM was when we were discussing Superman, Tinkerbell or Sonic the Hedgehog? Well, you’ve come a long way, baby!
Now, the word ZOOM can be:
Now, the word ZOOM can be:
An adjective: “We can connect on a Zoom call.”
A noun: “Let’s use Zoom to conduct the meeting."
And even a verb: “Let’s Zoom at 1:30 Eastern time.”
A noun: “Let’s use Zoom to conduct the meeting."
And even a verb: “Let’s Zoom at 1:30 Eastern time.”
Remember, too, when we thought that the only people who hung around computers and got their mail electronically were … ‘geeks?’ (Sorry). As of 2019, the percentage of adults in the U.S. who use the internet looks like this:
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Ages 18-20: 100% 30-49: 97% 50-64: 88% 65+: 73% |
Since we are now at home more, these numbers are probably higher. In fact, young or old, here or there, retired, working, or simply trying to figure things out, one of the most important basic human needs is CONNECTION, and today more and more of us are relying on technology.
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Psychologist Matthew D. Lieberman, professor at UCLA says in his book, Social, that “the human need to connect is as important as the need for food and shelter.” But how are we supposed to connect at this time when we are told to stay home, limit in-person exposure, and wear a mask?
Enter ZOOM (noun). Don’t sigh and tell me you are tired and bored with the ‘on-line, sitting-at-your-computer-and-watching’ activity. In fact, what was often thought of as impersonal and just too ‘electronic’ has become a rescuer of the lonely, a partner in exercise, an entertainment source, and truly an educational tool for all ages at all stages.
“the human need to connect is as important as the need for food and shelter.”
I know some people have a love/hate relationship with technology. I know, too, that when you are zooming (verb) you can sometimes feel ‘lost in the crowd.’ But if planned properly, there is a way to host an on-line meeting that can be a lot of fun.
Let me introduce you to Zoom (adjective) BREAKOUT ROOMS:
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When I started talking about this, my friend Suzanne, said, “Hooray! A place to take a break from the tiresome world of Zoom!” Bob, on the other hand, said, “That sounds like a great way to sneak away from the meeting altogether!” But I think you will find Breakout Rooms to be a welcome change from the full meeting.
I recently attended a conference via Zoom (noun). There were more than 75 people in attendance, and I said my ‘hellos’ to the little rectangles that kept popping up on the screen. Of course, since all of us were muted by the host, I sat at my computer sounding something like this:
I recently attended a conference via Zoom (noun). There were more than 75 people in attendance, and I said my ‘hellos’ to the little rectangles that kept popping up on the screen. Of course, since all of us were muted by the host, I sat at my computer sounding something like this:
“Hello!” “Oh, it’s Joanne – Hi, Joanne!” “Wait – there’s Gary! Hi, Gary.” I was waving my hand around like an airport runway attendant hoping someone would respond. Of course, they couldn’t hear me. At some point my husband shouted from the other room, “What? Are you talking to me?” Finally, I had to settle for my greeting being a yellow emoji hand-wave in the corner of my rectangle.
The meeting officially opened. After we heard the introductions and the agenda, we listened to the invited speaker. Then, just as I was searching for when the first pause in the program would be, the host said, “Ok, now we are going to go to BREAKOUT ROOMS.”
Let’s think about this for a moment here. When you (used to) go to a big gathering of folks, how many people do you actually get to speak with? How often do you introduce yourself to someone you don’t know? When does everyone in the meeting actually get to speak up and share?
The real secret to keeping safe from Zoomitis (yes, even a new word!) is Breakout Rooms. Here’s how it works: The ‘host’ of your Zoom meeting has the control button titled “Breakout Rooms” along the bottom of the screen. Once pressed, this offers the chance to create new, smaller rooms in which to connect, based on the number of people per room requested and the duration of time spent there. In my case, we were often broken into no more than four per room, usually for 8-10 minutes, depending on the assignment.
The real secret to keeping safe from Zoomitis (yes, even a new word!) is Breakout Rooms. Here’s how it works: The ‘host’ of your Zoom meeting has the control button titled “Breakout Rooms” along the bottom of the screen. Once pressed, this offers the chance to create new, smaller rooms in which to connect, based on the number of people per room requested and the duration of time spent there. In my case, we were often broken into no more than four per room, usually for 8-10 minutes, depending on the assignment.
The real secret to keeping safe from
Zoomitis is Breakout Rooms.
You, the participant, don’t have to do anything except wait. You will be automatically transferred (‘Beam me down, Scotty!’) to the room where you have been assigned. When these rooms are used to enhance a discussion, it is a way for the host of the meeting to give participants a chance to share their thoughts as well as hear what others felt about what was just experienced.
It can also be used as an idea exchange for the next step in a project. Sometimes I’ve used breakout rooms for Newcomers to our city. In this case, there was not really an assignment – more of a ‘meet and greet’ with starter questions like “Where are you from?” and “What do you miss most about where you last lived?” It’s so nice to be greeted by just four larger rectangles. Each person gets two minutes to talk, and usually the discussion takes off from there.
Maybe you will find that Emily used to live in Denver – and knows your cousin! Or Frank moved here to retire and is thinking about starting a small business from home, or that Bob and his wife are filmmakers who decided this is the perfect city for a movie! Whatever the topic, each person has a chance to be heard. Once the time runs out, and by the way you’ll have a countdown clock visible so that everyone gets a chance to speak, then… Zoom! (verb) you are automatically ‘sent back’ to that place with all the little rectangles. It’s like magic! (“Beam me back up, Scotty!”)
You need connection. Technology is here to stay
and how you use it is up to you.
The point is that you can spend your time online in a large gathering and feel like you’ve watched TV for an hour, or you can come away knowing you really accomplished something, met new friends, and /or felt like you made your ideas and needs heard.
You need connection. Technology is here to stay, and how you use it – or grumble about its challenges – is up to you. So, to help my image of being ‘an Influencer,’ and to make you look really smart and tech-savvy, here are 4 tips for your trip around Zoom:
4 Tips for your Trip Around Zoom
- Join Zoom (noun) www.zoom.us. There is no charge to join.
- Learn how to schedule a Zoom meeting. (Follow the posted instructions) Remember there is no charge for conducting meetings under 40 minutes.
- Explore how to Zoom into breakout rooms. Remember that the purpose is to allow a lot of people to get to know each other/work together in smaller groups. And the extra plus is that you will really look smart and geeky.
- Understand that you may stumble but keep trying. Realize that any use of technology – including Zoom - takes patience, but it is worth it. The rewards are great, and you will really impress your friends, your kids – and especially your grandkids.
Invite me to your large meeting. I just might stop by – as long as you promise
to include Breakout Rooms.
May the Force Be With You!
Loretta
to include Breakout Rooms.
May the Force Be With You!
Loretta
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"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." -Wayne Dyer |
I recently came across this quote, and I liked it a lot. I thought about how much I miss traveling, so I decided to plan a trip - keeping the message in mind. It was a great experience. Here is my journal and a few pictures:
MY JOURNAL, 2020
“T’was the day of my travels…”
I just want to share
This trip during COVID
You’ll think you’ve been there!
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
I got up real early
To get a head start
So as not to miss out –
Now, isn’t that smart?
With my phone for pictures
I took a little blank book
To write down the adventure
I’ll call, “ Take a Good Look.”
The bedroom – it’s lovely
Those windows, great light!
Such pleasure I got
Enjoying the sight.
Then I looked at the wall
Saw the art in its frame
A beautiful flower…
Would I remember the name?
I just want to share
This trip during COVID
You’ll think you’ve been there!
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
I got up real early
To get a head start
So as not to miss out –
Now, isn’t that smart?
With my phone for pictures
I took a little blank book
To write down the adventure
I’ll call, “ Take a Good Look.”
The bedroom – it’s lovely
Those windows, great light!
Such pleasure I got
Enjoying the sight.
Then I looked at the wall
Saw the art in its frame
A beautiful flower…
Would I remember the name?
Ah, yes – it’s PROTEA!
The colors painted with flare
Then I smiled just remembering
Why we put it put there.
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
I knew where to go next.
I did not hesitate
The bathroom – so important -
Time to appreciate
The towels look pretty
All cream, black and white
A mirror reflecting -
The room looks so bright!
The colors painted with flare
Then I smiled just remembering
Why we put it put there.
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
I knew where to go next.
I did not hesitate
The bathroom – so important -
Time to appreciate
The towels look pretty
All cream, black and white
A mirror reflecting -
The room looks so bright!
Once showered and primped
I felt together and steady
With passport in hand
I was courageous and ready.
How often we travel
And almost always ignore
Things like fluffy, soft carpets
And a lovely tile floor.
I felt together and steady
With passport in hand
I was courageous and ready.
How often we travel
And almost always ignore
Things like fluffy, soft carpets
And a lovely tile floor.
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
The kitchen was next
I looked around with delight
Antique teapots and milk bottles
Were a beautiful sight
As I really looked at them
For the first time in a while
All the memories came;
They all made me smile
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
The kitchen was next
I looked around with delight
Antique teapots and milk bottles
Were a beautiful sight
As I really looked at them
For the first time in a while
All the memories came;
They all made me smile
The bottles with writing
Of unique shapes and sizes
Were found at flea markets
It was like winning prizes
And the teapots – all metal
From back in the day
Made such a happy
And colorful display
I opened the fridge
More colors I could see
Blueberries and strawberries,
And light green Kiwi.
It’s really important
I thought with a smile
To plan a trip to appreciate
Once in a while.
So start where you are;
Be your own wish-granting fairy!
Realize that your home
Can be the i-tin-er-ary!
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
Fortified, I continued
And explored all around.
There in the living room
My desk could be found
Of course, it’s familiar
Of course, I’m there every day
But now I could see it
In a new special way
The bookends - the rhinos
From that trip last fall
When was the last time
I noticed them at all?
Of unique shapes and sizes
Were found at flea markets
It was like winning prizes
And the teapots – all metal
From back in the day
Made such a happy
And colorful display
I opened the fridge
More colors I could see
Blueberries and strawberries,
And light green Kiwi.
It’s really important
I thought with a smile
To plan a trip to appreciate
Once in a while.
So start where you are;
Be your own wish-granting fairy!
Realize that your home
Can be the i-tin-er-ary!
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
Fortified, I continued
And explored all around.
There in the living room
My desk could be found
Of course, it’s familiar
Of course, I’m there every day
But now I could see it
In a new special way
The bookends - the rhinos
From that trip last fall
When was the last time
I noticed them at all?
My bookshelves are full
It was such fun to look
Remembering when reading
Meant holding a book!
It was such fun to look
Remembering when reading
Meant holding a book!
And that box full of pens -
That stay tall in their places.
How cute is that container
With my granddaughters’ faces!
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
The computer, a good friend,
A companion, and more
Bringing ZOOM and FACEBOOK greetings
Full of connections galore!
That stay tall in their places.
How cute is that container
With my granddaughters’ faces!
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
The computer, a good friend,
A companion, and more
Bringing ZOOM and FACEBOOK greetings
Full of connections galore!
Yes, on my trip I stayed home -
It was no hologram.
It made me realize very quickly
How lucky I am.
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
You try it -
(and don’t stop to clean out a drawer!)
It was no hologram.
It made me realize very quickly
How lucky I am.
On looking - On pausing-
On observing things-
What joy and excitement
Really NOTICING brings
You try it -
(and don’t stop to clean out a drawer!)
-Loretta
IS GOOD PRACTICE
FOR RETIREMENT!
Regardless of where you are in your professional journey, the experience of sheltering-in-place can be looked at as practice for retirement!
“Huh?” you say. “If this is retirement, don’t sign me up.” Or maybe you’re thinking there is no way this shelter-in-place has anything to do with retirement. Let's take a look:
It’s been over two months that we have been unable to go out to our usual places – work/gym/movies/parties/travel, etc. At first it seemed like it would be short-term, and we could handle it just fine. We can either work from home, catch up on our sleep, or simply relax. After all, there's online shopping, and we can have our groceries delivered.
“Huh?” you say. “If this is retirement, don’t sign me up.” Or maybe you’re thinking there is no way this shelter-in-place has anything to do with retirement. Let's take a look:
It’s been over two months that we have been unable to go out to our usual places – work/gym/movies/parties/travel, etc. At first it seemed like it would be short-term, and we could handle it just fine. We can either work from home, catch up on our sleep, or simply relax. After all, there's online shopping, and we can have our groceries delivered.
“Retirement is different,” you argue.
“Retirement will let me do what I want to do when I want to do it.
Now I can hardly go out - I wake up every morning wondering
'What am I going to do today?'"
“Retirement will let me do what I want to do when I want to do it.
Now I can hardly go out - I wake up every morning wondering
'What am I going to do today?'"
Exactly. As a retirement coach, I’ve spent a lot of time asking people, “So, when you retire, what are you going to do -and when are you going to do it?” I get answers like,
“Oh, I’ll figure that out later,
but I can tell you,
my bank statement looks good.!”
but I can tell you,
my bank statement looks good.!”
That's when I remind them that retirement is about more than money. Yes, having enough money is very important, and your financial consultant can work with you to help figure out how much will be enough for that sailboat, your dream travels, or simply to pay off your mortgage.
But what about the rest? This pandemic is putting those same questions to you right now. Are you physically fit? How do you handle change? Who is your social network? What brings you fulfillment and peace? Well, the good news is that with ‘shelter-in-place’ you have been practicing! Take a look:
But what about the rest? This pandemic is putting those same questions to you right now. Are you physically fit? How do you handle change? Who is your social network? What brings you fulfillment and peace? Well, the good news is that with ‘shelter-in-place’ you have been practicing! Take a look:
1 – GET PHYSICAL
I say: It’s so important to find the time and get into the habit of doing some form of exercise. Some people may find it hard to stick to a routine or think a walk with your dog in the morning is enough. Many people talk about how when they retire they are going to travel. Well, just remember traveling comes with physical and mental demands, like delays, uncomfortable seating or a crowded environment.
Taking care of your health and body will help you do what you want to
do and embrace those 20-30 years that are yours to enjoy when you do
decide to retire.
I say: It’s so important to find the time and get into the habit of doing some form of exercise. Some people may find it hard to stick to a routine or think a walk with your dog in the morning is enough. Many people talk about how when they retire they are going to travel. Well, just remember traveling comes with physical and mental demands, like delays, uncomfortable seating or a crowded environment.
Taking care of your health and body will help you do what you want to
do and embrace those 20-30 years that are yours to enjoy when you do
decide to retire.
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Covid-19 says: Ok… So you got restless sitting around. You figured out that taking walks and joining those online exercise classes
help you feel physically fit while I’m around? Good for you. Guess I’ll find somebody else who spends most of the day thinking exercise is getting up to check out what’s in the refrigerator. Speaking of the fridge, are those pants you always put on getting tighter... ? |
2 – WORK ON THE MENTAL
I say: “Things turn out best for those people who make the best
of how things turn out” is a mantra to live by. Having a positive mental outlook helps make you more resilient and able to better handle the changes that come your way. Sometimes, those plans you made just aren't going to work out. On the other hand, with a positive outlook you may start a new business or envision a whole new career.
According to a 2019 report by the Census Bureau and Bureau of Labor Statistics, the greatest share of older Americans in more than 50 years are working well into their 60s, and it's not because they need the money. Whatever you choose to do, work now on becoming more optimistic and you’ll be better able to handle stress.
I say: “Things turn out best for those people who make the best
of how things turn out” is a mantra to live by. Having a positive mental outlook helps make you more resilient and able to better handle the changes that come your way. Sometimes, those plans you made just aren't going to work out. On the other hand, with a positive outlook you may start a new business or envision a whole new career.
According to a 2019 report by the Census Bureau and Bureau of Labor Statistics, the greatest share of older Americans in more than 50 years are working well into their 60s, and it's not because they need the money. Whatever you choose to do, work now on becoming more optimistic and you’ll be better able to handle stress.
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Covid-19 says: Ha! I’m keeping you on your toes – is the curve up or leveling? Should you go out or stay in? Since everyone is home now, what’s for lunch? (Depressed yet?) I have to admit that somehow you really are pretty resilient. You’re using this time to clean out closets, plant that garden, and enjoy family time! Did I hear conversations about being grateful? About having confidence that the scientists will eventually come up with a vaccine? It kinda takes the fun out of my search and destroy.
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3 – BROADEN YOUR SOCIAL NETWORK
I say: "One of life’s basic human needs is connection." When thinking about retiring, how will you stay connected? If most of your friends and acquaintances have been people you work with, be aware that you will not be joining them for lunch every day. If you move somewhere near your kids and grandkids, remember kids grow up and are busy with their friends and activities. Take a good look at yourself. Think about who you are now and what you enjoy doing. Broaden your social network, and have a discussion with your partner about his/her vision of life in retirement.
I say: "One of life’s basic human needs is connection." When thinking about retiring, how will you stay connected? If most of your friends and acquaintances have been people you work with, be aware that you will not be joining them for lunch every day. If you move somewhere near your kids and grandkids, remember kids grow up and are busy with their friends and activities. Take a good look at yourself. Think about who you are now and what you enjoy doing. Broaden your social network, and have a discussion with your partner about his/her vision of life in retirement.
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Covid-19 says: Well, for those of you who have the ‘go-go’s’ just get
used to being at home. ‘Make new friends but keep the old,’ and all that? Well, maybe. But just because you are getting out a bit, don’t plan too many big dinners and parties yet. I’m still here. Although…, there does seem to be a lot of new neighborhood friendships happening. I noticed that before I arrived you never took the time to get to know your neighbors. Looks a lot different now. By the way, what’s the deal with Zoom? I thought it was just for business meetings! Lots of you guys got really creative and figured out how to work from home with meetings, talk and play with the grandkids, and even form book clubs where you can meet new people. Impressive. But just remember, it’s true I don’t like the heat - but there’s always winter! |
4 – EXAMINE YOUR SPIRITUALTY
I say: "When I talk about spirituality, I am talking about who you are as a
person – your basic core beliefs and values." Goals and priorities change as you get older. No longer do you strive for the promotion or the bigger house and fancier car. Instead, ask yourself, how important is feeling fulfilled? Spending time with family and friends? Being creative and motivated? Shifting easily into retirement requires taking inventory of yourself.
I say: "When I talk about spirituality, I am talking about who you are as a
person – your basic core beliefs and values." Goals and priorities change as you get older. No longer do you strive for the promotion or the bigger house and fancier car. Instead, ask yourself, how important is feeling fulfilled? Spending time with family and friends? Being creative and motivated? Shifting easily into retirement requires taking inventory of yourself.
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Covid-19 says: Well, well, look at that. You people have been so quick to reach out to each other. Even being kind enough to share your toilet paper? Amazing! After the restaurants closed, some of the owners kept people on by cooking meals for doctors, nurses and others at the hospitals. Impressive. I even hear that the donation centers are overloaded with bags and boxes of things that you finally realized you didn't need any more. (And you are not even waiting for the tax receipt!) All this “We are in this together,” stuff was a real surprise. But, whatever. I’m still here - until you figure out how to get rid of me!
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See? You are building good habits that will pay off when - some day! - you are ready for retirement. Isn't it funny how "Things turn out the best for people who make the best of how things turn out!"?
Keep practicing! Get physical; find creative ways to spend your time, and continue to offer random acts of kindness to your friends and neighbors. And feel good knowing that you are paving the path to retirement!
Keep practicing! Get physical; find creative ways to spend your time, and continue to offer random acts of kindness to your friends and neighbors. And feel good knowing that you are paving the path to retirement!
Loretta
Because “things turn out best for the people who make the best of how things turn out”, I have decided to repost one of my previous blogs. In today’s uncertain and scary times, when many of us:
I share with you this simple exercise. If done every day for 30 days, it
can help change your outlook. I resend this blog with my wishes that
you stay safe and healthy.
- Feel trapped at home
- Are overeating and over-streaming
- Are wondering if we will be able to go back to work
- Are wondering if our kids/grandkids will go back to school in the fall
I share with you this simple exercise. If done every day for 30 days, it
can help change your outlook. I resend this blog with my wishes that
you stay safe and healthy.
I'll give you the steps so you become empowered to look at the world differently and feel the joy and contentment you deserve!
 | There is real science behind the emotions of happiness and love. Dr. Barbara Frederickson, Psychologist and Neuroscience Professor at UNC, Chapel Hill said, “The ways that we feel happiness and well-being are actually showing up in the cells of our immune system and supporting our health.” What a great testimonial! Why wouldn’t we want to Make Happy a Habit? |
My challenge to you is based on the work of psychologist and happiness researcher, Shawn Achor. Surprising as it sounds, he says that it is possible to re-wire your brain to be happier.
You don’t have to wear a smiley-face hat or tell funny jokes. Simply doing the following five activities daily can rewire your brain towards happiness. (I include my order to just give you some idea of fitting it into your day. You can organize it however it is convenient for you).
You don’t have to wear a smiley-face hat or tell funny jokes. Simply doing the following five activities daily can rewire your brain towards happiness. (I include my order to just give you some idea of fitting it into your day. You can organize it however it is convenient for you).
1. THINK OF THREE THINGS YOU’RE GRATEFUL FOR
I like to do this – out loud – in the morning when I get up. I encourage those around me to join in. It’s a good family tradition.
2. WRITE ABOUT A POSITIVE EXPERIENCE FROM THE PAST 24 HOURS
I do this in the evening. I keep a notebook on my nightstand. This simple activity has the amazing power of changing your entire mindset. You will comb through the day, tossing aside the negative and focusing on the positive. Guaranteed to make you smile.
3. EXERCISE (AT LEAST 20 MIN)
I am a morning person, so I make time before breakfast to get in my exercise. Whether it is a brisk walk, time at the gym or climbing stairs, give yourself 20 minutes and increase your activity. I’m including four short videos of easy five-minute exercises on my website. Do all four in a day and you’ll have your 20 minutes!
4. MEDITATE (5-7 MIN)
I find that meditating mid-afternoon works for me. No need to think mantras or posing cross-legged on the carpet. The simplest meditation can be sitting quietly listening to soothing music (no words) – and focusing on either the music, your breathing or a body scan from head-to-toe. If you want some guidance, I like the free app HEADSPACE, which you can use with your earphones while sitting at your desk. Meditation calms and centers, helping you focus and better handle whatever comes your way.
5. PERFORM ONE RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS
All day every day is a good time for a random act of kindness. Performing a selfless act that helps, compliments or encourages someone has an amazing effect on all involved. You’ll enjoy every minute. To help get you started, I’ll post a list of suggestions on my website.
I like to do this – out loud – in the morning when I get up. I encourage those around me to join in. It’s a good family tradition.
2. WRITE ABOUT A POSITIVE EXPERIENCE FROM THE PAST 24 HOURS
I do this in the evening. I keep a notebook on my nightstand. This simple activity has the amazing power of changing your entire mindset. You will comb through the day, tossing aside the negative and focusing on the positive. Guaranteed to make you smile.
3. EXERCISE (AT LEAST 20 MIN)
I am a morning person, so I make time before breakfast to get in my exercise. Whether it is a brisk walk, time at the gym or climbing stairs, give yourself 20 minutes and increase your activity. I’m including four short videos of easy five-minute exercises on my website. Do all four in a day and you’ll have your 20 minutes!
4. MEDITATE (5-7 MIN)
I find that meditating mid-afternoon works for me. No need to think mantras or posing cross-legged on the carpet. The simplest meditation can be sitting quietly listening to soothing music (no words) – and focusing on either the music, your breathing or a body scan from head-to-toe. If you want some guidance, I like the free app HEADSPACE, which you can use with your earphones while sitting at your desk. Meditation calms and centers, helping you focus and better handle whatever comes your way.
5. PERFORM ONE RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS
All day every day is a good time for a random act of kindness. Performing a selfless act that helps, compliments or encourages someone has an amazing effect on all involved. You’ll enjoy every minute. To help get you started, I’ll post a list of suggestions on my website.
Encourage everyone around you to get involved
Please leave a note on one of the platforms below or comment on this blog post to let me know how you are doing.
Post some pictures of what you are grateful for and what makes you happy. I want to know how your random acts of kindness and writing about your positive experiences made you feel. Tell me about your time in meditation. And be sure to tell me when you start feeling like HAPPY is becoming a habit.
Good luck! And get your camera ready – you’ll be finding yourself smiling a lot more.
SHARE YOUR PROGRESS BY:
Don’t forget to include #makehappyahabit in your posts
Loretta
Post some pictures of what you are grateful for and what makes you happy. I want to know how your random acts of kindness and writing about your positive experiences made you feel. Tell me about your time in meditation. And be sure to tell me when you start feeling like HAPPY is becoming a habit.
Good luck! And get your camera ready – you’ll be finding yourself smiling a lot more.
SHARE YOUR PROGRESS BY:
- Instagram – FOLLOW @MAKEHAPPYAHABIT for inspiration and share your own pictures of what makes you happy
- Facebook – LIKE /MAKEHAPPYAHABIT and post an update about how the challenge is changing your outlook
- Twitter – FOLLOW @ACCOMPLISHCOACH and tweet your own progress
- Pinterest – FOLLOW /ACCOMPLISHCOACH and start a Happiness board
Don’t forget to include #makehappyahabit in your posts
Loretta
“People Who Need People
Are the Luckiest People in the World”
Are the Luckiest People in the World”
Can we talk? I think it’s time we discussed the proliferation of video conferencing tools – read that as Zoom and FaceTime. I’ve been using FaceTime for quite a while to catch up with friends and call my grandkids in other states.
But, I have to admit something. Lately, I’ve become a little more self-conscious. One time after dialing in on FaceTime and waiting for an answer, my husband caught me studying the screen, trying to rearrange my wrinkles and tilt my head so my neck looked smoother.
But, I have to admit something. Lately, I’ve become a little more self-conscious. One time after dialing in on FaceTime and waiting for an answer, my husband caught me studying the screen, trying to rearrange my wrinkles and tilt my head so my neck looked smoother.
"I THINK FACETIME WAS INVENTED BY PLASTIC SURGEONS!"
“Whoa! Why are you making faces at the screen?” he asked. I shrugged innocently and stared back at the phone, hoping someone would answer before he would figure it out.
Too late.
“You know,” he laughed, “I think FaceTime was invented by plastic surgeons! ‘Let’s see... we could tighten here and tuck there… Should work fine!’” He shook his head and walked away smiling. Of course. I couldn’t help it. It’s just that until someone answers the phone, all I see is a closeup of… ME!
Too late.
“You know,” he laughed, “I think FaceTime was invented by plastic surgeons! ‘Let’s see... we could tighten here and tuck there… Should work fine!’” He shook his head and walked away smiling. Of course. I couldn’t help it. It’s just that until someone answers the phone, all I see is a closeup of… ME!
And now... in the midst of the social-distancing edict with the Coronavirus, I suddenly find myself Zooming and Face-Timing more than ever! (I’ve even made them into verbs). We have to connect – whether for work or family and friends, and so I often find myself saying, “Who is that person in the picture with the dark roots and the sagging jowls?”
(Actually, I’m beginning to favor that multi-participant Zoom meeting when the picture is so small you can hardly recognize who it is, much less notice the roots and count the wrinkles.)
(Actually, I’m beginning to favor that multi-participant Zoom meeting when the picture is so small you can hardly recognize who it is, much less notice the roots and count the wrinkles.)
BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS!
Oh, wait! I’ve just found the command on Zoom that if you click on the down arrow next to the little video camera icon, there is a box called ‘touch up my appearance’
Needless to say, I just tried it. Huh? Was there a difference? I’m waiting to see Angelina Jolie, and to me I look exactly like I did before I pressed the button! Hold on… I know, I’ll ‘unclick’ and go back and try it again (You know these quirky computers).
Nope – me, again. Oh well, I’ve decided to like me.
After all, at least once my grandkids answer, I’m reminded that they don’t see wrinkles; they just see their loving Grammie, and I get to see a window into their lives in that moment. It often looks something like this:
My two-year-old granddaughter grabs the phone and
immediately hangs up.
My five-year-old granddaughter explains the solar system
and asks me if I know when Pluto was declared a non-planet.
My eight-year-old grandson shows me how he uses the Anamoji App
to change the image of himself on the phone. So instead of his face, I am talking to
a lion, a teddy bear, smoke-breathing dragon or a skeleton.
Or sometimes all of those - every 5 seconds!
immediately hangs up.
My five-year-old granddaughter explains the solar system
and asks me if I know when Pluto was declared a non-planet.
My eight-year-old grandson shows me how he uses the Anamoji App
to change the image of himself on the phone. So instead of his face, I am talking to
a lion, a teddy bear, smoke-breathing dragon or a skeleton.
Or sometimes all of those - every 5 seconds!
My twelve-year-old granddaughter talks to me
while finessing her Tik-Tok video for You Tube,
which often involves a running cartwheel.
My fourteen-year-old grandson holds the phone up to his nose
and asks if I can see any boogers.
My seventeen-year-old granddaughter says,
“Hi, Grammie. I’ve got to go study.”
And I love every word they say and every action they offer, even the booger hunting.
while finessing her Tik-Tok video for You Tube,
which often involves a running cartwheel.
My fourteen-year-old grandson holds the phone up to his nose
and asks if I can see any boogers.
My seventeen-year-old granddaughter says,
“Hi, Grammie. I’ve got to go study.”
And I love every word they say and every action they offer, even the booger hunting.
You are an Important Part of Your Grandchild's Life
So, whether you are calling friends or whether you are Grammy, Nana, PopPop, Bubbie, MeMaw, or BobaLou, get used to using video conferencing.
You are an important part of your grandchild’s life, and they are certainly an important part of yours. And whether you read stories, share a laugh, or just want to be part of a Tuesday evening, a FaceTime or Zoom call brings excitement, connection, and shows your thoughtfulness and love.
[…and it also shows a huge close up. Hmm, come to think of it, maybe next time I’ll try the Panda Bear on the Animoji app - or maybe I can invite more tiny-picture people to share in a Zoom call!]
Loretta
You are an important part of your grandchild’s life, and they are certainly an important part of yours. And whether you read stories, share a laugh, or just want to be part of a Tuesday evening, a FaceTime or Zoom call brings excitement, connection, and shows your thoughtfulness and love.
[…and it also shows a huge close up. Hmm, come to think of it, maybe next time I’ll try the Panda Bear on the Animoji app - or maybe I can invite more tiny-picture people to share in a Zoom call!]
Loretta
Author
Loretta Saff, M.A., CPC, CPRC
As an active writer, both nationally and internationally, Loretta Saff's humor columns, blog, and lifestyle articles reflect an insight in dealing with situations that helps people get to their core issues and encourage confidence, trust and support.
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