My friend Emily and I were out walking last week. Suddenly she stopped short and said, “Did you hear that Bob did The Big-R?” I was puzzled. “The Big-R?”

“That which cannot be named,” she uttered in her best Harry Potter-esque voice. I smiled and leaned in closer and whispered, “Are you talking about ‘Retirement’?”

“Shhh!” she hissed. “Seriously, don’t use that word anymore. It conveys the wrong message!”  

“What in the world do you mean?” I asked. She sighed, and I felt like she was searching for a way to say something nicely. “You, of all people, should know.”

“Look,” I said, “I know there is a lot of misinterpretation about the word ‘Retirement,’ but really, … comparing it to *Voldemort?”

Emily shook her head. “Misinterpretation? People hear the Big-R word and think the person is over the hill, incapable of anything new and fresh…, and, basically, A HAS BEEN!”

My mouth dropped open. “Ok, here’s proof!” she said as she pulled out her phone and pointed to a webpage. “Just look at the definition from the fancy Oxford English Language Dictionary!”

I looked in amazement as she continued. “I have no problem with definition #1 but check out #2! And, by the way, I’ve been thinking maybe you should stick with being  called a ‘Life Coach.’ If this is how people are viewing The Big-R, listing yourself first as a Retirement Coach could put people off!”

“Oh, Em,” I said shaking my head. “Just like a Life Coach, a Retirement Coach helps people deal with life’s transitions. It’s like the change from being single and then getting married or going from being a couple to having kids. ‘The Big-R’ requires thinking about and planning for the next 20 to 30 years! A person will have more time and more choices for not just how to fill the day but also for how to feel fulfilled at the end of the day. Planning is how to avoid definition #2!” We decided to order coffee and sat down outside.

​“If it was my dictionary,” I continued, “Definition #2 would be something like, 

As Emily thought about it, I decided to have some fun and sound less like a coach. “Take Clark Kent, for example. He knew he was meant to use his superpowers to seek truth and justice, but he couldn’t just transition from Smallville to Metropolis without a plan to protect his identity! He got a job as a reporter at the Daily Planet and located a nearby phone booth.” She started laughing and almost choked on her coffee. But she was listening. 

“Here’s another example - suppose you decide to get fit and enter a half marathon. You wouldn’t just get up that morning, put on a good pair of running shoes and join the race - hoping to get to the finish line, right?! You’d map out a training program to make sure you were prepared to succeed.”

She wiped some coffee from her chin and laughed out loud. “Ok, but what about other people’s reactions? I just saw Susan, and she was complaining that her neighbors think since she is around all the time, she can watch for their deliveries!” She paused, “And her kids think she is a full-time babysitter; they assume she’s always available.”

I smiled and shook my head. “Stop worrying about other people! The fact is that it’s smart to approach retirement with a plan and an attitude of adventure and creativity.

Today, more than 50% of retirees are working part-time and others are volunteering or busy learning something new.  It does not have to be solitude and loneliness!    

​“So,” Emily said. “What now? It’s obvious we need to do something about that word!” I smiled. “Well, you’re right and people have made lots of suggestions. But the Big-R word has been around a long time.  Instead, I say we keep the word ‘Retirement’ and just add a tag line:

Maybe I should print up tee shirts!

Loretta
​
*Voldemort, also known as 'The Dark Lord' in the Harry Potter series, was so evil that even his name was not to be spoken.
*Oxford Languages is the world’s leading dictionary publisher, with over 150 years of experience creating and delivering authoritative dictionaries globally in more than 50 languages.

Some are young and some are old     
Some do not do what they’re told     
But I’m tired of being home and slow     
​So how to revive my get up and go?     

At first, I thought answers on TV would do
But wait – do I listen to channel one or two?
Before, whenever when I had an ouchie
I followed the advice of Dr. Fauci!
 
But then science changed – from yes to no
Is the light red for stop or green for go?
Southwest says, “We’re careful and make a fuss”
American says, “Get in line; fly with us!”
 
A Doc* at Penn says it’s “Anxiety-One and Two”
So, consider them both – which are you?
Anxiety One cries – “There’s Covid out there!
It lurks, then strikes! It doesn’t care!”
 
Anxiety Two? Well, check this one out:
It’s the mixing with others that makes people pout.
They say, “It’s been so long.., but it’s ok now.”
Yet when socializing – they forget how!

​* Lily Brown, director of the Center for the Treatment and Study of Anxiety at the University of Pennsylvania’s Perelman School of Medicine

I have been feeling great joy in offering this campaign again to all of us. Now that spring has finally arrived and we are allowing ourselves more freedom to mix and mingle again, I believe that having a positive attitude is one of the most important steps to finding peace and fulfillment.
 
When I remind myself of these five steps to making happy a habit, I gain personal strength and the resilience to deal with ‘stuff’ that life sends my way. That half-full glass allows me to be more creative and to realize that if I’m blocked in one direction, there are many ways to reach my personal goals. For example, ​this is a blog I wrote when in lockdown from Covid.

Wishing you happily ever after,

Loretta

I’m Loretta Saff, and I am pleased to bring to you - the retiree or ‘almost’ retiree - ideas and resources for what to do and who to contact once the retirement party is over. 
 
Retirement is not "One Size Fits All.” And a Modern Retirement includes planning for the next 20-30 years! Spending time involved in activities that YOU truly enjoy and that make you feel fulfilled is the key to success on the journey. But how do you find out what is out there?
 
I hope this podcast helps.
 
Enjoy! 

https://www.coachingwithloretta.com/videos.html

2020 was undeniably hard. Like, really really unimaginably difficult and sad and trying for so many people. A lot of folks have just been hanging on and getting through. Practicing happy habits has understandably not been at the top or even the middle of  the priority list. But finally there is a little light at the end of the tunnel. Self-care can start to be something that you prioritize in 2021. And now, more than ever, self-care and finding your way to happiness is important for your health and well-being and for those around you.

There is real science behind the emotions of happiness and love. Dr. Barbara Frederickson, Psychologist and Neuroscience Professor at UNC, Chapel Hill said, “The ways that we feel happiness and well-being are actually showing up in the cells of our immune system and supporting our health.”

I did a 30-day Make Happy a Habit challenge back in 2016 and now I'm ready for a refresher 2021-style!

I'll be starting my 2021 challenge on March 1. Follow along with my progress and hopefully you'll find some inspiration from my journey for your own. I'd love for you to join me ... Share your progress … Post some pictures of what you are grateful for and what makes you happy. I want to know how your random acts of kindness and writing about your positive experiences made you feel. Tell me about your time in meditation. And be sure to tell me when you start feeling like HAPPY is becoming a habit.

I'll be posting all month long at:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/makehappyahabit/​
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/makehappyahabit​
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ACCOMPLISHCOACH/​
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ACCOMPLISHCOACH/​

Hope you join me!

Loretta
​

I remember when my 60th birthday was getting closer. I checked twice to make sure I had done the math correctly, and when the numbers added up, the first thing I thought was, “But hey, I’m not OLD!”
         
60 is a big number. It’s full of heavy words like "Social Security" and "Medicare", "Osteoporosis", and "Senior Moments." I was turning 60, but I didn’t FEEL 60. 

I looked in the mirror and said out loud, “Why not think about 60 with more positive words like, “Wiser”, “Sassier”, and “Bring it on!” That’s when I decided to have some fun. Carrie Underwood had just recorded her hit song, “Before He Cheats.” The music was great; it was country, and we had recently moved to Nashville! Why not write some new lyrics for it, expressing exactly how I felt about turning 60! 

Right now, you’re probably just guessin’
That I’d like a bus tour for my summertime vacation
 
Right now, you’re probably just thinkin’
That I’m sassy cause my hormones are low
But you don’t know
 
Repeat Chorus
I threw the pieces all over the yard
It was my A A R P membership card
I got Botox in each and every fold
 
No early bird special or senior day
I joined a gym and I know the way
So, don’t you dare call me OLD
 
Just tryin’ to save a little trouble for the next girl
So the next time you hear 60,
Don’t call her OLD!

​Of course, not wanting to be called ‘Old” at 60 is not much different from the other stages in life that when we decide we want to be a different age:      

As a retirement coach, I hear musings from clients about reaching their 60s and 70s. 

Loretta 

Go to my website www.coachingwithloretta.com and click on the ‘Inspiration’ tab to meet Steve, a guy who has just retired. You can help him make some choices in his retirement journey – that might just help you, too. Go ahead, have some fun!

11.  OVERALL..., I promise to remind myself  to be  GRATEFUL ​and to remain optimistic that some day we will all be able to hug again. 

Stay safe and healthy!
​
Loretta

Remember when the only time we talked about ZOOM was when we were discussing Superman, Tinkerbell or Sonic the Hedgehog?  Well, you’ve come a long way, baby!
 
Now, the word ZOOM can be:

​Remember, too, when we thought that the only people who hung around computers and got their mail electronically were … ‘geeks?’ (Sorry). As of 2019, the percentage of adults in the U.S. who use the internet looks like this: 

​Psychologist Matthew D. Lieberman, professor at UCLA says in his book, Social, that “the human need to connect is as important as the need for food and shelter.” But how are we supposed to connect at this time when we are told to stay home, limit in-person exposure, and wear a mask? 

​I know some people have a love/hate relationship with technology. I know, too, that when you are zooming (verb) you can sometimes feel ‘lost in the crowd.’ But if planned properly, there is a way to host an on-line meeting that can be a lot of fun. 

Let me introduce you to Zoom (adjective) BREAKOUT ROOMS:

When I started talking about this, my friend Suzanne, said, “Hooray! A place to take a break from the tiresome world of Zoom!” Bob, on the other hand, said, “That sounds like a great way to sneak away from the meeting altogether!” But I think you will find Breakout Rooms to be a welcome change from the full meeting.

​I recently attended a conference via Zoom (noun). There were more than 75 people in attendance, and I said my ‘hellos’ to the little rectangles that kept popping up on the screen. Of course, since all of us were muted by the host, I sat at my computer sounding something like this:

​The meeting officially opened. After we heard the introductions and the agenda, we listened to the invited speaker. Then, just as I was searching for when the first pause in the program would be, the host said, “Ok, now we are going to go to BREAKOUT ROOMS.” 

​You, the participant, don’t have to do anything except wait. You will be automatically transferred (‘Beam me down, Scotty!’) to the room where you have been assigned. When these rooms are used to enhance a discussion, it is a way for the host of the meeting to give participants a chance to share their thoughts as well as hear what others felt about what was just experienced.

​ It can also be used as an idea exchange for the next step in a project. Sometimes I’ve used breakout rooms for Newcomers to our city. In this case, there was not really an assignment – more of a ‘meet and greet’ with starter questions like “Where are you from?” and “What do you miss most about where you last lived?” It’s so nice to be greeted by just four larger rectangles. Each person gets two minutes to talk, and usually the discussion takes off from there. 

Maybe you will find that Emily used to live in Denver – and knows your cousin! Or Frank moved here to retire and is thinking about starting a small business from home, or that Bob and his wife are filmmakers who decided this is the perfect city for a movie! Whatever the topic, each person has a chance to be heard. Once the time runs out, and by the way you’ll have a countdown clock visible so that everyone gets a chance to speak, then… Zoom! (verb) you are automatically ‘sent back’ to that place with all the little rectangles. It’s like magic! (“Beam me back up, Scotty!”)

​The point is that you can spend your time online in a large gathering and feel like you’ve watched TV for an hour, or you can come away knowing you really accomplished something, met new friends, and /or felt like you made your ideas and needs heard.

​You need connection. Technology is here to stay, and how you use it – or grumble about its challenges – is up to you. So, to help my image of being ‘an Influencer,’ and to make you look really smart and tech-savvy, here are 4 tips for your trip around Zoom:

Invite me to your large meeting. I just might stop by – as long as you promise
​ to include Breakout Rooms.    
 
May the Force Be With You!

 Loretta