I recently came across this quote, and I liked it a lot. I thought about how much I miss traveling, so I decided to plan a trip - keeping the message in mind. It was a great experience. Here is my journal and a few pictures: MY JOURNAL, 2020“T’was the day of my travels…” I just want to share This trip during COVID You’ll think you’ve been there! On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings I got up real early To get a head start So as not to miss out – Now, isn’t that smart? With my phone for pictures I took a little blank book To write down the adventure I’ll call, “ Take a Good Look.” The bedroom – it’s lovely Those windows, great light! Such pleasure I got Enjoying the sight. Then I looked at the wall Saw the art in its frame A beautiful flower… Would I remember the name? 
Ah, yes – it’s PROTEA! The colors painted with flare Then I smiled just remembering Why we put it put there. On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings I knew where to go next. I did not hesitate The bathroom – so important - Time to appreciate The towels look pretty All cream, black and white A mirror reflecting - The room looks so bright! 
Once showered and primped I felt together and steady With passport in hand I was courageous and ready. How often we travel And almost always ignore Things like fluffy, soft carpets And a lovely tile floor. 
On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings The kitchen was next I looked around with delight Antique teapots and milk bottles Were a beautiful sight As I really looked at them For the first time in a while All the memories came; They all made me smile 
The bottles with writing Of unique shapes and sizes Were found at flea markets It was like winning prizes And the teapots – all metal From back in the day Made such a happy And colorful display I opened the fridge More colors I could see Blueberries and strawberries, And light green Kiwi. It’s really important I thought with a smile To plan a trip to appreciate Once in a while. So start where you are; Be your own wish-granting fairy! Realize that your home Can be the i-tin-er-ary! On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings Fortified, I continued And explored all around. There in the living room My desk could be found Of course, it’s familiar Of course, I’m there every day But now I could see it In a new special way The bookends - the rhinos From that trip last fall When was the last time I noticed them at all? 
My bookshelves are full It was such fun to look Remembering when reading Meant holding a book! 
And that box full of pens - That stay tall in their places. How cute is that container With my granddaughters’ faces! On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings The computer, a good friend, A companion, and more Bringing ZOOM and FACEBOOK greetings Full of connections galore! 
Yes, on my trip I stayed home - It was no hologram. It made me realize very quickly How lucky I am. On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings You try it - (and don’t stop to clean out a drawer!) -Loretta
1 Comment
 IS GOOD PRACTICE |
|
Covid-19 says: Ok… So you got restless sitting around. You figured out that taking walks and joining those online exercise classes
help you feel physically fit while I’m around? Good for you. Guess I’ll find somebody else who spends most of the day thinking exercise is getting up to check out what’s in the refrigerator. Speaking of the fridge, are those pants you always put on getting tighter... ? |
2 – WORK ON THE MENTAL
I say: “Things turn out best for those people who make the best
of how things turn out” is a mantra to live by. Having a positive mental outlook helps make you more resilient and able to better handle the changes that come your way. Sometimes, those plans you made just aren't going to work out. On the other hand, with a positive outlook you may start a new business or envision a whole new career.
According to a 2019 report by the Census Bureau and Bureau of Labor Statistics, the greatest share of older Americans in more than 50 years are working well into their 60s, and it's not because they need the money. Whatever you choose to do, work now on becoming more optimistic and you’ll be better able to handle stress.
I say: “Things turn out best for those people who make the best
of how things turn out” is a mantra to live by. Having a positive mental outlook helps make you more resilient and able to better handle the changes that come your way. Sometimes, those plans you made just aren't going to work out. On the other hand, with a positive outlook you may start a new business or envision a whole new career.
According to a 2019 report by the Census Bureau and Bureau of Labor Statistics, the greatest share of older Americans in more than 50 years are working well into their 60s, and it's not because they need the money. Whatever you choose to do, work now on becoming more optimistic and you’ll be better able to handle stress.
|
|
Covid-19 says: Ha! I’m keeping you on your toes – is the curve up or leveling? Should you go out or stay in? Since everyone is home now, what’s for lunch? (Depressed yet?) I have to admit that somehow you really are pretty resilient. You’re using this time to clean out closets, plant that garden, and enjoy family time! Did I hear conversations about being grateful? About having confidence that the scientists will eventually come up with a vaccine? It kinda takes the fun out of my search and destroy.
|
3 – BROADEN YOUR SOCIAL NETWORK
I say: "One of life’s basic human needs is connection." When thinking about retiring, how will you stay connected? If most of your friends and acquaintances have been people you work with, be aware that you will not be joining them for lunch every day. If you move somewhere near your kids and grandkids, remember kids grow up and are busy with their friends and activities. Take a good look at yourself. Think about who you are now and what you enjoy doing. Broaden your social network, and have a discussion with your partner about his/her vision of life in retirement.
I say: "One of life’s basic human needs is connection." When thinking about retiring, how will you stay connected? If most of your friends and acquaintances have been people you work with, be aware that you will not be joining them for lunch every day. If you move somewhere near your kids and grandkids, remember kids grow up and are busy with their friends and activities. Take a good look at yourself. Think about who you are now and what you enjoy doing. Broaden your social network, and have a discussion with your partner about his/her vision of life in retirement.
|
|
Covid-19 says: Well, for those of you who have the ‘go-go’s’ just get
used to being at home. ‘Make new friends but keep the old,’ and all that? Well, maybe. But just because you are getting out a bit, don’t plan too many big dinners and parties yet. I’m still here. Although…, there does seem to be a lot of new neighborhood friendships happening. I noticed that before I arrived you never took the time to get to know your neighbors. Looks a lot different now. By the way, what’s the deal with Zoom? I thought it was just for business meetings! Lots of you guys got really creative and figured out how to work from home with meetings, talk and play with the grandkids, and even form book clubs where you can meet new people. Impressive. But just remember, it’s true I don’t like the heat - but there’s always winter! |
4 – EXAMINE YOUR SPIRITUALTY
I say: "When I talk about spirituality, I am talking about who you are as a
person – your basic core beliefs and values." Goals and priorities change as you get older. No longer do you strive for the promotion or the bigger house and fancier car. Instead, ask yourself, how important is feeling fulfilled? Spending time with family and friends? Being creative and motivated? Shifting easily into retirement requires taking inventory of yourself.
I say: "When I talk about spirituality, I am talking about who you are as a
person – your basic core beliefs and values." Goals and priorities change as you get older. No longer do you strive for the promotion or the bigger house and fancier car. Instead, ask yourself, how important is feeling fulfilled? Spending time with family and friends? Being creative and motivated? Shifting easily into retirement requires taking inventory of yourself.
|
|
Covid-19 says: Well, well, look at that. You people have been so quick to reach out to each other. Even being kind enough to share your toilet paper? Amazing! After the restaurants closed, some of the owners kept people on by cooking meals for doctors, nurses and others at the hospitals. Impressive. I even hear that the donation centers are overloaded with bags and boxes of things that you finally realized you didn't need any more. (And you are not even waiting for the tax receipt!) All this “We are in this together,” stuff was a real surprise. But, whatever. I’m still here - until you figure out how to get rid of me!
|
See? You are building good habits that will pay off when - some day! - you are ready for retirement. Isn't it funny how "Things turn out the best for people who make the best of how things turn out!"?
Keep practicing! Get physical; find creative ways to spend your time, and continue to offer random acts of kindness to your friends and neighbors. And feel good knowing that you are paving the path to retirement!
Keep practicing! Get physical; find creative ways to spend your time, and continue to offer random acts of kindness to your friends and neighbors. And feel good knowing that you are paving the path to retirement!
Loretta
Because “things turn out best for the people who make the best of how things turn out”, I have decided to repost one of my previous blogs. In today’s uncertain and scary times, when many of us:
I share with you this simple exercise. If done every day for 30 days, it
can help change your outlook. I resend this blog with my wishes that
you stay safe and healthy.
- Feel trapped at home
- Are overeating and over-streaming
- Are wondering if we will be able to go back to work
- Are wondering if our kids/grandkids will go back to school in the fall
I share with you this simple exercise. If done every day for 30 days, it
can help change your outlook. I resend this blog with my wishes that
you stay safe and healthy.
I'll give you the steps so you become empowered to look at the world differently and feel the joy and contentment you deserve!
 | There is real science behind the emotions of happiness and love. Dr. Barbara Frederickson, Psychologist and Neuroscience Professor at UNC, Chapel Hill said, “The ways that we feel happiness and well-being are actually showing up in the cells of our immune system and supporting our health.” What a great testimonial! Why wouldn’t we want to Make Happy a Habit? |
My challenge to you is based on the work of psychologist and happiness researcher, Shawn Achor. Surprising as it sounds, he says that it is possible to re-wire your brain to be happier.
You don’t have to wear a smiley-face hat or tell funny jokes. Simply doing the following five activities daily can rewire your brain towards happiness. (I include my order to just give you some idea of fitting it into your day. You can organize it however it is convenient for you).
You don’t have to wear a smiley-face hat or tell funny jokes. Simply doing the following five activities daily can rewire your brain towards happiness. (I include my order to just give you some idea of fitting it into your day. You can organize it however it is convenient for you).
1. THINK OF THREE THINGS YOU’RE GRATEFUL FOR
I like to do this – out loud – in the morning when I get up. I encourage those around me to join in. It’s a good family tradition.
2. WRITE ABOUT A POSITIVE EXPERIENCE FROM THE PAST 24 HOURS
I do this in the evening. I keep a notebook on my nightstand. This simple activity has the amazing power of changing your entire mindset. You will comb through the day, tossing aside the negative and focusing on the positive. Guaranteed to make you smile.
3. EXERCISE (AT LEAST 20 MIN)
I am a morning person, so I make time before breakfast to get in my exercise. Whether it is a brisk walk, time at the gym or climbing stairs, give yourself 20 minutes and increase your activity. I’m including four short videos of easy five-minute exercises on my website. Do all four in a day and you’ll have your 20 minutes!
4. MEDITATE (5-7 MIN)
I find that meditating mid-afternoon works for me. No need to think mantras or posing cross-legged on the carpet. The simplest meditation can be sitting quietly listening to soothing music (no words) – and focusing on either the music, your breathing or a body scan from head-to-toe. If you want some guidance, I like the free app HEADSPACE, which you can use with your earphones while sitting at your desk. Meditation calms and centers, helping you focus and better handle whatever comes your way.
5. PERFORM ONE RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS
All day every day is a good time for a random act of kindness. Performing a selfless act that helps, compliments or encourages someone has an amazing effect on all involved. You’ll enjoy every minute. To help get you started, I’ll post a list of suggestions on my website.
I like to do this – out loud – in the morning when I get up. I encourage those around me to join in. It’s a good family tradition.
2. WRITE ABOUT A POSITIVE EXPERIENCE FROM THE PAST 24 HOURS
I do this in the evening. I keep a notebook on my nightstand. This simple activity has the amazing power of changing your entire mindset. You will comb through the day, tossing aside the negative and focusing on the positive. Guaranteed to make you smile.
3. EXERCISE (AT LEAST 20 MIN)
I am a morning person, so I make time before breakfast to get in my exercise. Whether it is a brisk walk, time at the gym or climbing stairs, give yourself 20 minutes and increase your activity. I’m including four short videos of easy five-minute exercises on my website. Do all four in a day and you’ll have your 20 minutes!
4. MEDITATE (5-7 MIN)
I find that meditating mid-afternoon works for me. No need to think mantras or posing cross-legged on the carpet. The simplest meditation can be sitting quietly listening to soothing music (no words) – and focusing on either the music, your breathing or a body scan from head-to-toe. If you want some guidance, I like the free app HEADSPACE, which you can use with your earphones while sitting at your desk. Meditation calms and centers, helping you focus and better handle whatever comes your way.
5. PERFORM ONE RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS
All day every day is a good time for a random act of kindness. Performing a selfless act that helps, compliments or encourages someone has an amazing effect on all involved. You’ll enjoy every minute. To help get you started, I’ll post a list of suggestions on my website.
Encourage everyone around you to get involved
Please leave a note on one of the platforms below or comment on this blog post to let me know how you are doing.
Post some pictures of what you are grateful for and what makes you happy. I want to know how your random acts of kindness and writing about your positive experiences made you feel. Tell me about your time in meditation. And be sure to tell me when you start feeling like HAPPY is becoming a habit.
Good luck! And get your camera ready – you’ll be finding yourself smiling a lot more.
SHARE YOUR PROGRESS BY:
Don’t forget to include #makehappyahabit in your posts
Loretta
Post some pictures of what you are grateful for and what makes you happy. I want to know how your random acts of kindness and writing about your positive experiences made you feel. Tell me about your time in meditation. And be sure to tell me when you start feeling like HAPPY is becoming a habit.
Good luck! And get your camera ready – you’ll be finding yourself smiling a lot more.
SHARE YOUR PROGRESS BY:
- Instagram – FOLLOW @MAKEHAPPYAHABIT for inspiration and share your own pictures of what makes you happy
- Facebook – LIKE /MAKEHAPPYAHABIT and post an update about how the challenge is changing your outlook
- Twitter – FOLLOW @ACCOMPLISHCOACH and tweet your own progress
- Pinterest – FOLLOW /ACCOMPLISHCOACH and start a Happiness board
Don’t forget to include #makehappyahabit in your posts
Loretta
“People Who Need People
Are the Luckiest People in the World”
Are the Luckiest People in the World”
Can we talk? I think it’s time we discussed the proliferation of video conferencing tools – read that as Zoom and FaceTime. I’ve been using FaceTime for quite a while to catch up with friends and call my grandkids in other states.
But, I have to admit something. Lately, I’ve become a little more self-conscious. One time after dialing in on FaceTime and waiting for an answer, my husband caught me studying the screen, trying to rearrange my wrinkles and tilt my head so my neck looked smoother.
But, I have to admit something. Lately, I’ve become a little more self-conscious. One time after dialing in on FaceTime and waiting for an answer, my husband caught me studying the screen, trying to rearrange my wrinkles and tilt my head so my neck looked smoother.
"I THINK FACETIME WAS INVENTED BY PLASTIC SURGEONS!"
“Whoa! Why are you making faces at the screen?” he asked. I shrugged innocently and stared back at the phone, hoping someone would answer before he would figure it out.
Too late.
“You know,” he laughed, “I think FaceTime was invented by plastic surgeons! ‘Let’s see... we could tighten here and tuck there… Should work fine!’” He shook his head and walked away smiling. Of course. I couldn’t help it. It’s just that until someone answers the phone, all I see is a closeup of… ME!
Too late.
“You know,” he laughed, “I think FaceTime was invented by plastic surgeons! ‘Let’s see... we could tighten here and tuck there… Should work fine!’” He shook his head and walked away smiling. Of course. I couldn’t help it. It’s just that until someone answers the phone, all I see is a closeup of… ME!
And now... in the midst of the social-distancing edict with the Coronavirus, I suddenly find myself Zooming and Face-Timing more than ever! (I’ve even made them into verbs). We have to connect – whether for work or family and friends, and so I often find myself saying, “Who is that person in the picture with the dark roots and the sagging jowls?”
(Actually, I’m beginning to favor that multi-participant Zoom meeting when the picture is so small you can hardly recognize who it is, much less notice the roots and count the wrinkles.)
(Actually, I’m beginning to favor that multi-participant Zoom meeting when the picture is so small you can hardly recognize who it is, much less notice the roots and count the wrinkles.)
BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS!
Oh, wait! I’ve just found the command on Zoom that if you click on the down arrow next to the little video camera icon, there is a box called ‘touch up my appearance’
Needless to say, I just tried it. Huh? Was there a difference? I’m waiting to see Angelina Jolie, and to me I look exactly like I did before I pressed the button! Hold on… I know, I’ll ‘unclick’ and go back and try it again (You know these quirky computers).
Nope – me, again. Oh well, I’ve decided to like me.
After all, at least once my grandkids answer, I’m reminded that they don’t see wrinkles; they just see their loving Grammie, and I get to see a window into their lives in that moment. It often looks something like this:
My two-year-old granddaughter grabs the phone and
immediately hangs up.
My five-year-old granddaughter explains the solar system
and asks me if I know when Pluto was declared a non-planet.
My eight-year-old grandson shows me how he uses the Anamoji App
to change the image of himself on the phone. So instead of his face, I am talking to
a lion, a teddy bear, smoke-breathing dragon or a skeleton.
Or sometimes all of those - every 5 seconds!
immediately hangs up.
My five-year-old granddaughter explains the solar system
and asks me if I know when Pluto was declared a non-planet.
My eight-year-old grandson shows me how he uses the Anamoji App
to change the image of himself on the phone. So instead of his face, I am talking to
a lion, a teddy bear, smoke-breathing dragon or a skeleton.
Or sometimes all of those - every 5 seconds!
My twelve-year-old granddaughter talks to me
while finessing her Tik-Tok video for You Tube,
which often involves a running cartwheel.
My fourteen-year-old grandson holds the phone up to his nose
and asks if I can see any boogers.
My seventeen-year-old granddaughter says,
“Hi, Grammie. I’ve got to go study.”
And I love every word they say and every action they offer, even the booger hunting.
while finessing her Tik-Tok video for You Tube,
which often involves a running cartwheel.
My fourteen-year-old grandson holds the phone up to his nose
and asks if I can see any boogers.
My seventeen-year-old granddaughter says,
“Hi, Grammie. I’ve got to go study.”
And I love every word they say and every action they offer, even the booger hunting.
You are an Important Part of Your Grandchild's Life
So, whether you are calling friends or whether you are Grammy, Nana, PopPop, Bubbie, MeMaw, or BobaLou, get used to using video conferencing.
You are an important part of your grandchild’s life, and they are certainly an important part of yours. And whether you read stories, share a laugh, or just want to be part of a Tuesday evening, a FaceTime or Zoom call brings excitement, connection, and shows your thoughtfulness and love.
[…and it also shows a huge close up. Hmm, come to think of it, maybe next time I’ll try the Panda Bear on the Animoji app - or maybe I can invite more tiny-picture people to share in a Zoom call!]
Loretta
You are an important part of your grandchild’s life, and they are certainly an important part of yours. And whether you read stories, share a laugh, or just want to be part of a Tuesday evening, a FaceTime or Zoom call brings excitement, connection, and shows your thoughtfulness and love.
[…and it also shows a huge close up. Hmm, come to think of it, maybe next time I’ll try the Panda Bear on the Animoji app - or maybe I can invite more tiny-picture people to share in a Zoom call!]
Loretta
My husband’s a mathematician – isn’t that scary! Sometimes people ask me what we talk about. Sometimes I’ll tell them that he whispers seductive equations in my ear – like “just think about the square root of eight hundred and twelve…” But most often he tells me and most people that “mathematics is everywhere.”
I certainly found it in a recent article on retirement in Forbes Magazine. The author, Joseph Coughlin, a well-known researcher, teacher, and head of the MIT Age Lab, talked about “The New Math of Retirement Togetherness.”
It went something like this: There are 164 hours in a week. During that time, approximately 8 hours a day are spent sleeping, leaving 112 waking hours in a week for each of us. [No, this is not an SAT Math question.]
Now, if a typical workday is, say, 9 hours, that makes it minus 45 hours a week away from your partner. This brings it to 67 hours of together time. Then he continues his calculation by allowing an hour a day for travel (subtracting 5 for the workdays) and brought the discussion to 62 hours of ‘togetherness’ in a week.
I certainly found it in a recent article on retirement in Forbes Magazine. The author, Joseph Coughlin, a well-known researcher, teacher, and head of the MIT Age Lab, talked about “The New Math of Retirement Togetherness.”
It went something like this: There are 164 hours in a week. During that time, approximately 8 hours a day are spent sleeping, leaving 112 waking hours in a week for each of us. [No, this is not an SAT Math question.]
Now, if a typical workday is, say, 9 hours, that makes it minus 45 hours a week away from your partner. This brings it to 67 hours of together time. Then he continues his calculation by allowing an hour a day for travel (subtracting 5 for the workdays) and brought the discussion to 62 hours of ‘togetherness’ in a week.
6 Hours a Day vs 16 Hours a Day
At this point Coughlin went on to narrow things down stating that life routines of home/child/personal responsibilities, etc., result in the fact that the reality is that a typical couple may often spend only six (6) hours a day together. Quite a surprise when we actually do the math, right?
But that’s not quite the end of the math. Professor Coughlin then went on to compare this number to the number of hours couples spend together in RETIREMENT. This means that the original 45 hours a week of work that were subtracted are now added back. Oh, and so are the 5 allowed for travel. So, let’s see, that’s now 45 + 5 = 50 divided by 5 = an extra 10 waking hours a day for a retired couple to spend together!
But that’s not quite the end of the math. Professor Coughlin then went on to compare this number to the number of hours couples spend together in RETIREMENT. This means that the original 45 hours a week of work that were subtracted are now added back. Oh, and so are the 5 allowed for travel. So, let’s see, that’s now 45 + 5 = 50 divided by 5 = an extra 10 waking hours a day for a retired couple to spend together!
Is that paradise? What will you do with that newly awarded together time? Suppose you already have a schedule and your partner questions your comings and goings, how will you react?
These are situations that you and your significant other must consider as retirement comes closer. Sure, visions of the perfect dream vacations and spontaneous trips to see the grandkids come to mind. Golf, beach, gardening and bike rides bring smiles. But how often will you do those things?
These are situations that you and your significant other must consider as retirement comes closer. Sure, visions of the perfect dream vacations and spontaneous trips to see the grandkids come to mind. Golf, beach, gardening and bike rides bring smiles. But how often will you do those things?
Does Your List Match That of Your Partner's?
What if your list of ‘things to do’ doesn’t match that of your partner’s? In fact, do you really want everything on your list to match that of your partner?
Just think about how smart and happy you will feel in retirement when you and your partner have already worked on these challenges! Perhaps you explored the opportunities for starting a new business or offering consulting in an area you know well. You’ll feel glad you made new friends in that Saturday morning photography class you signed up for two years ago and have been enjoying ever since.
Just think about how smart and happy you will feel in retirement when you and your partner have already worked on these challenges! Perhaps you explored the opportunities for starting a new business or offering consulting in an area you know well. You’ll feel glad you made new friends in that Saturday morning photography class you signed up for two years ago and have been enjoying ever since.
And your partner will be especially happy to see you thrive. Everyone has different needs and activities that give them purpose and make them feel fulfilled. There will be things that you do together, but there must also be those separate activities that bring you joy. A few years before you retire is a great time to take a good look at who you are and what you really want.
I ran into a neighbor and his wife recently, when I was out walking the dog. He is an executive who is looking forward to leaving the deadlines and fundraising behind. I asked him how he plans to spend his time, and his wife immediately answered, “He’s going to paint the family room, clean out the garden, and join the choir so we can sing together on Sundays!” I looked at him and he rolled his eyes and said, “Do I have a choice?” The answer is “yes, you do have a choice.” Discuss it now so you both can enjoy the added time together later.
The Bureau of Statistics notes that a male at 65 has, on the average, another 20 years to live and enjoy life. A female has around 22 years. Here’s one more math note: that is another 1/3 of your life
How are you going to spend yours? Will you be looking at your partner every morning asking, “What are we going to do today?” Or are you going to be full of your own well-thought-out ideas and plans that sometimes are shared and sometimes accomplished on your own?
Help yourself enjoy your retirement by planning before you get there. Help your relationship with your partner by talking about and understanding each person’s wants and needs. Then,
Help yourself enjoy your retirement by planning before you get there. Help your relationship with your partner by talking about and understanding each person’s wants and needs. Then,
ON YOUR MARK, GET SET… GO!
Good Luck! Loretta
Good Luck! Loretta
P.S. Last night, before he turned out the light, my husband whispered:
‘A’ squared plus ‘B’ squared = ‘C’ squared!
‘A’ squared plus ‘B’ squared = ‘C’ squared!
#retirement #couples #relationships #planning
You’re surrounded by it. All the stores are full of Holiday Cheer, and Sirius Radio has had a “Holiday Songs” station since just after Halloween. Now, they are almost here – THE HOLIDAYS.
#holidays #life strategies #positivity
#holidays #life strategies #positivity
Start Now and Be "Positively Fabulous!"
While to some this may mean hugs and giggles, to others it can shout “Stress Alert! Stress Alert!”Whatever the message coming your way, a little MENTAL PREPARATION will help you be ready to enjoy and greet your family and friends with enthusiasm.
Here are three simple and helpful hints to make the season “Positively Fabulous!,” one of happy memories and family togetherness.
Here are three simple and helpful hints to make the season “Positively Fabulous!,” one of happy memories and family togetherness.
1. Remember that you are in Charge of Your Thoughts.
Yep, that’s YOU – with a choice. Listen to yourself and analyze your thoughts. If you’ve just come back from a trip, what is the first thing you talk about – the bad weather or the wonderful food? The annoying airports or the beautiful scenery? Just the order in which you mention things tells you something about yourself.
Try to rethink what you talk about. Spend more time on the good times you had; talk about something that made you laugh. In fact, try not mentioning the ‘annoying’ things that happened. I bet you’ll forget about them!
Try to rethink what you talk about. Spend more time on the good times you had; talk about something that made you laugh. In fact, try not mentioning the ‘annoying’ things that happened. I bet you’ll forget about them!
2. Surround Yourself with Positive People.
Now, if you find yourself stuck out on the porch with Aunt Sally, who is telling you how her arthritis stops her from having fun, try getting her to tell you something positive. Ask her about her dog. Explore what books she likes to read. Get her to talk about wonderful Thanksgivings she remembers over the years. If Aunt Sally is too negative, go get her a mimosa, drop it off, and excuse yourself to the bathroom!
3. Be Nice to Yourself.
Do the things you like to do. Enjoy a massage? Want time to read? Love playing with the kids? Make time to do it. Make a holiday schedule that includes things that YOU like to do. When you are happy and relaxed, it will make you much more fun to be around and tolerant of others.
I’ve stopped at three so you can now go and practice. Make time to do it, and write and tell me how it all went!
Remember: "'Tis the season to be jolly!"
Happy Holidays!!
Happy Holidays!!
~Loretta
Boo! It’s almost Halloween. Since mid September you’ve seen all the preparations, decorations, and merchandise. There are lights for your lawn, bags of trick-or-treat candies for your give-away bowl, and – of course - the Starbuck’s Pumpkin Spice latte!
Now comes the big question. You are probably going to a Halloween party, so...
Now comes the big question. You are probably going to a Halloween party, so...
“Who are you going to be?”
I’ll bet you probably started planning for it far in advance. After all, you’ll need to think it through, get a costume, make sure it’s comfortable, and check that it looks good. Will you be someone scary? Someone cool? Someone funny? A gorilla? A princess? A Zombie? Such choices! And what fun to play and search, and be creative.
Which reminds me of …, RETIREMENT! So...
“Who are you going to be?”
Soon your old identity of “doctor,” “lawyer,” “businessman,” “teacher,” will be no longer applicable, so who are you going to be without that business card?
It’s a good idea to start planning now. Just like for Halloween, you’ll need to make some plans, decide how you want to spend your time, and then figure out how you will make it all happen. You can try on different costumes and take different paths towards the treats you so desire.
The special beauty of retirement is that you can always take off the costume if it becomes uncomfortable. Then you can change into something else!
It’s a good idea to start planning now. Just like for Halloween, you’ll need to make some plans, decide how you want to spend your time, and then figure out how you will make it all happen. You can try on different costumes and take different paths towards the treats you so desire.
The special beauty of retirement is that you can always take off the costume if it becomes uncomfortable. Then you can change into something else!
Take Bob, for example. He knew when he retired, he was going to spend his time riding and grooming horses. He had a place to start.
He soon found that doing this all day every day was not really what he had in mind. So, he then cut back to going to the stables twice a week. And since he always liked writing, now he spends a lot of time writing mysteries set in the horseback riding world.
He soon found that doing this all day every day was not really what he had in mind. So, he then cut back to going to the stables twice a week. And since he always liked writing, now he spends a lot of time writing mysteries set in the horseback riding world.
Emily’s love for taking photographs had to take a back seat to work and family responsibilities. Two years before she retired, she made some plans and signed up for a weekend course in photography to sharpen her skills. She loves going out in the early morning to walk along the lake, and her nature photographs are beautiful.
Recently, someone asked her to take photos of their son’s wedding and various other special events. That then turned into teaching photography as a continuing education course to adults at the local high school.
It all started with having a plan. That is the secret to success with most things, and it is really important in retirement. Sure, you might say you have your finances in order, but after all, retirement is about so much more than the money.
Recently, someone asked her to take photos of their son’s wedding and various other special events. That then turned into teaching photography as a continuing education course to adults at the local high school.
It all started with having a plan. That is the secret to success with most things, and it is really important in retirement. Sure, you might say you have your finances in order, but after all, retirement is about so much more than the money.
Eliminate the tricks; make way for the treats! Happy Halloween this week! And start planning now for your Happy Retirement!
Loretta Saff is a Certified Professional Retirement Coach and can be reached at www.coachingwithloretta.com.
Yikes! I just read a statistic that 28% of adults age 50 and older are ‘physically inactive.’ Hmmm… let’s just call that ‘do not exercise.’
One of the most important ‘musts’ for people–retired or not–is exercise. That is, of course, assuming you want better heart health, mental sharpness and reduced risk for chronic diseases.
One of the most important ‘musts’ for people–retired or not–is exercise. That is, of course, assuming you want better heart health, mental sharpness and reduced risk for chronic diseases.
If you think you should get a pass because of various excuses, forget it. I know them all, including:
"I'm too busy/tired." We all know you can find time if something is a priority. So think of it this way - call it 'doing something for my heart' or 'for my mental sharpness'. I assume those are priorities. And by the way, remember that exercise gives you more energy and gets you ready to meet busy schedules.
"I hate to exercise." There are lots of things that come under the heading of exercise. Dancing?Gardening? Hide and go seek with your grandkids? Believe it or not, even walking with purpose around the park or the mall will give you credit-if done on a regular basis. Convinced yet?
"I'm too old." My aerobics instructor just told the class that one of her students in another class will be 90 next week! There is not an age restriction on exercising. Obviously, you can choose what kind of exercise works for you. Just choose one. But forget the 'too old' whine. The only person you are fooling is yourself.
"I'm too busy/tired." We all know you can find time if something is a priority. So think of it this way - call it 'doing something for my heart' or 'for my mental sharpness'. I assume those are priorities. And by the way, remember that exercise gives you more energy and gets you ready to meet busy schedules.
"I hate to exercise." There are lots of things that come under the heading of exercise. Dancing?Gardening? Hide and go seek with your grandkids? Believe it or not, even walking with purpose around the park or the mall will give you credit-if done on a regular basis. Convinced yet?
"I'm too old." My aerobics instructor just told the class that one of her students in another class will be 90 next week! There is not an age restriction on exercising. Obviously, you can choose what kind of exercise works for you. Just choose one. But forget the 'too old' whine. The only person you are fooling is yourself.
For those who have never really had an exercise routine – other than saying, “I’m going to start exercising, next week”-here are 3 simple hints to move you forward:
1–Ask yourself WHY you never seem to get to ‘next week.’ Try to be honest about what is stopping you from starting. Write it down.
2–Make an exercise plan keeping in mind your answers from #1.
Include your WHERE:
3–On your Mark...,Get Set...,GO! Buy some shoes (not like Barbie's!) and a comfortable outfit. Don't talk about your size, shape or weight. Those things don't matter. Repeat after me: “Heart health, mental sharpness, reduced risk for chronic diseases.
1–Ask yourself WHY you never seem to get to ‘next week.’ Try to be honest about what is stopping you from starting. Write it down.
2–Make an exercise plan keeping in mind your answers from #1.
Include your WHERE:
- At a gym close by? (Ask about a free membership called ‘Silver Sneakers.’)
- In your neighborhood with a partner to motivate? (No membership needed.)
- Two days? three days? a week
- Morning? Afternoon? (When can you really follow through?)
3–On your Mark...,Get Set...,GO! Buy some shoes (not like Barbie's!) and a comfortable outfit. Don't talk about your size, shape or weight. Those things don't matter. Repeat after me: “Heart health, mental sharpness, reduced risk for chronic diseases.
Loretta
Let’s talk travel. I hear it from seniors all the time.
“I want more time to travel.”
“When I retire, I intend to travel.”
“Finally I will be able to explore and travel.
“I want more time to travel.”
“When I retire, I intend to travel.”
“Finally I will be able to explore and travel.
As I write this blog, I am sitting in a hotel in Charlotte, North Carolina. Charlotte was not my destination; it was a connecting city for my trip overseas. So, why am I here?
Because: I left home and everything was go. The airport was not very crowded, security did not flag me for an extra look, and the flight out was on time. There were storms in the area but they did not seem to be too threatening.
Then: Twenty minutes out of Charlotte, the pilot announced that there was a ‘popup’ storm that included lightening, and the tower asked us to circle for a bit. The storm intensified, and soon our fuel was running low. We had to be diverted to a nearby airport to wait out the storm.
At first, we all thought it was a quick mover. You know summer storms, they come and they go. However, it was more than three hours later that we were finally able to make the 20 minute flight to Charlotte.
Upon arrival we were greeted with the chaos of missed and cancelled flights, and certainly the maybe of “Oh, if I run to the gate, I still may be able to get on and get out.” Long story short, the doors to my flight were closed, and along with several other people I was turned away and told to make other plan.
That is why I am sitting in a hotel in Charlotte, North Carolina. My message? Travel is fun; travel is interesting; travel is educational, and travel can be hard.
Because: I left home and everything was go. The airport was not very crowded, security did not flag me for an extra look, and the flight out was on time. There were storms in the area but they did not seem to be too threatening.
Then: Twenty minutes out of Charlotte, the pilot announced that there was a ‘popup’ storm that included lightening, and the tower asked us to circle for a bit. The storm intensified, and soon our fuel was running low. We had to be diverted to a nearby airport to wait out the storm.
At first, we all thought it was a quick mover. You know summer storms, they come and they go. However, it was more than three hours later that we were finally able to make the 20 minute flight to Charlotte.
Upon arrival we were greeted with the chaos of missed and cancelled flights, and certainly the maybe of “Oh, if I run to the gate, I still may be able to get on and get out.” Long story short, the doors to my flight were closed, and along with several other people I was turned away and told to make other plan.
That is why I am sitting in a hotel in Charlotte, North Carolina. My message? Travel is fun; travel is interesting; travel is educational, and travel can be hard.
How to best deal with travel at any stage – especially in the retirement years? Here are a few hints:
- Be resilient. Accept that your plans will change, and often you may have to compromise to find a solution. If something goes smoothly, consider yourself lucky.
- Try to be in good physical condition. Your gate is not always close by, especially if you are transferring..
- Have a positive outlook. It helps no one if you complain over and over. People will be quicker to help you if you give them a smile and a thank you.
- Be patient. The lines can be long, the security may choose you at random, and looking annoyed will only make it take longer.
Those are just a few hints. That said, even with my delays and rescheduling, here is why I am grateful.
- I was able to get a hotel room (Many people had to sleep in the airport – on a chair!)
- There was a seat on the same flight on the next day (and the weather is supposed to be better).
- I was told my luggage would be rerouted so it will travel with me - and I think it is.
So, as summer and retirement and vacation time comes your way, you'll have smoother sailing when you come mentally and physically prepared to go with the flow and be a travel champion.
Bon voyage!
Loretta
Who isn’t looking for ways to be more motivated? Who isn’t a little annoyed at yourself for not following through on all those things you really want to do?
Here’s an idea that will help. I call it “Dear Me,”. Based on a study done at Columbia Business School, this activity not only encouraged futuristic thinking, but it also proved to be a real motivational tool.
Here are the three simple steps:
Here’s an idea that will help. I call it “Dear Me,”. Based on a study done at Columbia Business School, this activity not only encouraged futuristic thinking, but it also proved to be a real motivational tool.
Here are the three simple steps:
- Write a letter to yourself (that’s the ‘Dear Me’ part) – and make it the YOU 20 years from now.
- Address yourself as who you would like to be in 20 years.
- Include thoughts about areas of life you feel are important and activities you would like to be doing
That’s it. Sounds pretty simple, right? The results at Columbia were very impressive. The professors found that people really started to care more when they became more connected to their future selves. The participants exercised more often, thought about more fulfilling ways to spend their free time, and actually began to take better care of their relationships.
The interesting part here is that not only are you thinking about your future, you are actually planning based what you really want. And you are writing it all down.
Need a little help? Here's a sample:
The interesting part here is that not only are you thinking about your future, you are actually planning based what you really want. And you are writing it all down.
Need a little help? Here's a sample:
Dear Me,
I’m so glad to see myself healthy and happy as I fill my time enjoying the community-wide activities I always loved. The neighborhood book club I started is a huge success (even if Emily keeps insisting on bringing wine!), and becoming a docent at the gallery was genius. Now not only do I have to learn about each new exhibit that arrives but I also get to interact with the public!
I also love my blogs! They bring me both joy and insight each time I post. My Facebook group, “Make Happy a Habit,” is encouraging and positive. It causes people to stop and think how they, too, can bring happiness into their lives. Yay for me!
I’m proud of myself and send hugs.
From
Me
I’m so glad to see myself healthy and happy as I fill my time enjoying the community-wide activities I always loved. The neighborhood book club I started is a huge success (even if Emily keeps insisting on bringing wine!), and becoming a docent at the gallery was genius. Now not only do I have to learn about each new exhibit that arrives but I also get to interact with the public!
I also love my blogs! They bring me both joy and insight each time I post. My Facebook group, “Make Happy a Habit,” is encouraging and positive. It causes people to stop and think how they, too, can bring happiness into their lives. Yay for me!
I’m proud of myself and send hugs.
From
Me
Now when you actually have a picture of yourself focusing on what you think you want to do – and feel how it makes you feel – it becomes more real.
These results are not really surprising. After all, once you realize that you are the one making today’s decisions to reach tomorrow’s dreams, it can make all the difference.
So, go ahead… Whether you send yourself an email or actually use pen and paper, write that “Dear Me…” letter today. And let me know how it makes you feel.
These results are not really surprising. After all, once you realize that you are the one making today’s decisions to reach tomorrow’s dreams, it can make all the difference.
So, go ahead… Whether you send yourself an email or actually use pen and paper, write that “Dear Me…” letter today. And let me know how it makes you feel.
Author
Loretta Saff, M.A., CPC, CPRC
As an active writer, both nationally and internationally, Loretta Saff's humor columns, blog, and lifestyle articles reflect an insight in dealing with situations that helps people get to their core issues and encourage confidence, trust and support.
Categories
All
Children
Couples
Decision Making
Grandparenting
Holiday Tips
"Let's Talk Retirement"
Life Strategies
Make Happy A Habit
Modern Retirement
Parenting
Personal Empowerment
Retirement
Social Distancing
Technology
Videos
Zoom
Archives
March 2025
October 2024
July 2024
June 2024
March 2024
November 2023
July 2023
June 2023
March 2023
December 2022
November 2022
October 2022
September 2022
July 2022
May 2022
March 2022
February 2022
January 2022
December 2021
October 2021
September 2021
July 2021
June 2021
April 2021
March 2021
February 2021
January 2021
September 2020
July 2020
June 2020
April 2020
January 2020
December 2019
October 2019
July 2019
March 2019
February 2019
January 2019
September 2018
August 2018
March 2018
February 2016
RSS Feed
