I recently came across this quote, and I liked it a lot. I thought about how much I miss traveling, so I decided to plan a trip - keeping the message in mind. It was a great experience. Here is my journal and a few pictures: MY JOURNAL, 2020“T’was the day of my travels…” I just want to share This trip during COVID You’ll think you’ve been there! On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings I got up real early To get a head start So as not to miss out – Now, isn’t that smart? With my phone for pictures I took a little blank book To write down the adventure I’ll call, “ Take a Good Look.” The bedroom – it’s lovely Those windows, great light! Such pleasure I got Enjoying the sight. Then I looked at the wall Saw the art in its frame A beautiful flower… Would I remember the name? Ah, yes – it’s PROTEA! The colors painted with flare Then I smiled just remembering Why we put it put there. On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings I knew where to go next. I did not hesitate The bathroom – so important - Time to appreciate The towels look pretty All cream, black and white A mirror reflecting - The room looks so bright! Once showered and primped I felt together and steady With passport in hand I was courageous and ready. How often we travel And almost always ignore Things like fluffy, soft carpets And a lovely tile floor. On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings The kitchen was next I looked around with delight Antique teapots and milk bottles Were a beautiful sight As I really looked at them For the first time in a while All the memories came; They all made me smile The bottles with writing Of unique shapes and sizes Were found at flea markets It was like winning prizes And the teapots – all metal From back in the day Made such a happy And colorful display I opened the fridge More colors I could see Blueberries and strawberries, And light green Kiwi. It’s really important I thought with a smile To plan a trip to appreciate Once in a while. So start where you are; Be your own wish-granting fairy! Realize that your home Can be the i-tin-er-ary! On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings Fortified, I continued And explored all around. There in the living room My desk could be found Of course, it’s familiar Of course, I’m there every day But now I could see it In a new special way The bookends - the rhinos From that trip last fall When was the last time I noticed them at all? My bookshelves are full It was such fun to look Remembering when reading Meant holding a book! And that box full of pens - That stay tall in their places. How cute is that container With my granddaughters’ faces! On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings The computer, a good friend, A companion, and more Bringing ZOOM and FACEBOOK greetings Full of connections galore! Yes, on my trip I stayed home - It was no hologram. It made me realize very quickly How lucky I am. On looking - On pausing- On observing things- What joy and excitement Really NOTICING brings You try it - (and don’t stop to clean out a drawer!) -Loretta
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IS GOOD PRACTICE |
Covid-19 says: Ok… So you got restless sitting around. You figured out that taking walks and joining those online exercise classes
help you feel physically fit while I’m around? Good for you. Guess I’ll find somebody else who spends most of the day thinking exercise is getting up to check out what’s in the refrigerator. Speaking of the fridge, are those pants you always put on getting tighter... ? |
I say: “Things turn out best for those people who make the best
of how things turn out” is a mantra to live by. Having a positive mental outlook helps make you more resilient and able to better handle the changes that come your way. Sometimes, those plans you made just aren't going to work out. On the other hand, with a positive outlook you may start a new business or envision a whole new career.
According to a 2019 report by the Census Bureau and Bureau of Labor Statistics, the greatest share of older Americans in more than 50 years are working well into their 60s, and it's not because they need the money. Whatever you choose to do, work now on becoming more optimistic and you’ll be better able to handle stress.
Covid-19 says: Ha! I’m keeping you on your toes – is the curve up or leveling? Should you go out or stay in? Since everyone is home now, what’s for lunch? (Depressed yet?) I have to admit that somehow you really are pretty resilient. You’re using this time to clean out closets, plant that garden, and enjoy family time! Did I hear conversations about being grateful? About having confidence that the scientists will eventually come up with a vaccine? It kinda takes the fun out of my search and destroy.
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I say: "One of life’s basic human needs is connection." When thinking about retiring, how will you stay connected? If most of your friends and acquaintances have been people you work with, be aware that you will not be joining them for lunch every day. If you move somewhere near your kids and grandkids, remember kids grow up and are busy with their friends and activities. Take a good look at yourself. Think about who you are now and what you enjoy doing. Broaden your social network, and have a discussion with your partner about his/her vision of life in retirement.
Covid-19 says: Well, for those of you who have the ‘go-go’s’ just get
used to being at home. ‘Make new friends but keep the old,’ and all that? Well, maybe. But just because you are getting out a bit, don’t plan too many big dinners and parties yet. I’m still here. Although…, there does seem to be a lot of new neighborhood friendships happening. I noticed that before I arrived you never took the time to get to know your neighbors. Looks a lot different now. By the way, what’s the deal with Zoom? I thought it was just for business meetings! Lots of you guys got really creative and figured out how to work from home with meetings, talk and play with the grandkids, and even form book clubs where you can meet new people. Impressive. But just remember, it’s true I don’t like the heat - but there’s always winter! |
I say: "When I talk about spirituality, I am talking about who you are as a
person – your basic core beliefs and values." Goals and priorities change as you get older. No longer do you strive for the promotion or the bigger house and fancier car. Instead, ask yourself, how important is feeling fulfilled? Spending time with family and friends? Being creative and motivated? Shifting easily into retirement requires taking inventory of yourself.
Covid-19 says: Well, well, look at that. You people have been so quick to reach out to each other. Even being kind enough to share your toilet paper? Amazing! After the restaurants closed, some of the owners kept people on by cooking meals for doctors, nurses and others at the hospitals. Impressive. I even hear that the donation centers are overloaded with bags and boxes of things that you finally realized you didn't need any more. (And you are not even waiting for the tax receipt!) All this “We are in this together,” stuff was a real surprise. But, whatever. I’m still here - until you figure out how to get rid of me!
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Keep practicing! Get physical; find creative ways to spend your time, and continue to offer random acts of kindness to your friends and neighbors. And feel good knowing that you are paving the path to retirement!
- Feel trapped at home
- Are overeating and over-streaming
- Are wondering if we will be able to go back to work
- Are wondering if our kids/grandkids will go back to school in the fall
I share with you this simple exercise. If done every day for 30 days, it
can help change your outlook. I resend this blog with my wishes that
you stay safe and healthy.
I'll give you the steps so you become empowered to look at the world differently and feel the joy and contentment you deserve!
There is real science behind the emotions of happiness and love. Dr. Barbara Frederickson, Psychologist and Neuroscience Professor at UNC, Chapel Hill said, “The ways that we feel happiness and well-being are actually showing up in the cells of our immune system and supporting our health.” What a great testimonial! Why wouldn’t we want to Make Happy a Habit? |
You don’t have to wear a smiley-face hat or tell funny jokes. Simply doing the following five activities daily can rewire your brain towards happiness. (I include my order to just give you some idea of fitting it into your day. You can organize it however it is convenient for you).
I like to do this – out loud – in the morning when I get up. I encourage those around me to join in. It’s a good family tradition.
2. WRITE ABOUT A POSITIVE EXPERIENCE FROM THE PAST 24 HOURS
I do this in the evening. I keep a notebook on my nightstand. This simple activity has the amazing power of changing your entire mindset. You will comb through the day, tossing aside the negative and focusing on the positive. Guaranteed to make you smile.
3. EXERCISE (AT LEAST 20 MIN)
I am a morning person, so I make time before breakfast to get in my exercise. Whether it is a brisk walk, time at the gym or climbing stairs, give yourself 20 minutes and increase your activity. I’m including four short videos of easy five-minute exercises on my website. Do all four in a day and you’ll have your 20 minutes!
4. MEDITATE (5-7 MIN)
I find that meditating mid-afternoon works for me. No need to think mantras or posing cross-legged on the carpet. The simplest meditation can be sitting quietly listening to soothing music (no words) – and focusing on either the music, your breathing or a body scan from head-to-toe. If you want some guidance, I like the free app HEADSPACE, which you can use with your earphones while sitting at your desk. Meditation calms and centers, helping you focus and better handle whatever comes your way.
5. PERFORM ONE RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS
All day every day is a good time for a random act of kindness. Performing a selfless act that helps, compliments or encourages someone has an amazing effect on all involved. You’ll enjoy every minute. To help get you started, I’ll post a list of suggestions on my website.
Encourage everyone around you to get involved
Post some pictures of what you are grateful for and what makes you happy. I want to know how your random acts of kindness and writing about your positive experiences made you feel. Tell me about your time in meditation. And be sure to tell me when you start feeling like HAPPY is becoming a habit.
Good luck! And get your camera ready – you’ll be finding yourself smiling a lot more.
SHARE YOUR PROGRESS BY:
- Instagram – FOLLOW @MAKEHAPPYAHABIT for inspiration and share your own pictures of what makes you happy
- Facebook – LIKE /MAKEHAPPYAHABIT and post an update about how the challenge is changing your outlook
- Twitter – FOLLOW @ACCOMPLISHCOACH and tweet your own progress
- Pinterest – FOLLOW /ACCOMPLISHCOACH and start a Happiness board
Don’t forget to include #makehappyahabit in your posts
Loretta
I certainly found it in a recent article on retirement in Forbes Magazine. The author, Joseph Coughlin, a well-known researcher, teacher, and head of the MIT Age Lab, talked about “The New Math of Retirement Togetherness.”
It went something like this: There are 164 hours in a week. During that time, approximately 8 hours a day are spent sleeping, leaving 112 waking hours in a week for each of us. [No, this is not an SAT Math question.]
Now, if a typical workday is, say, 9 hours, that makes it minus 45 hours a week away from your partner. This brings it to 67 hours of together time. Then he continues his calculation by allowing an hour a day for travel (subtracting 5 for the workdays) and brought the discussion to 62 hours of ‘togetherness’ in a week.
But that’s not quite the end of the math. Professor Coughlin then went on to compare this number to the number of hours couples spend together in RETIREMENT. This means that the original 45 hours a week of work that were subtracted are now added back. Oh, and so are the 5 allowed for travel. So, let’s see, that’s now 45 + 5 = 50 divided by 5 = an extra 10 waking hours a day for a retired couple to spend together!
These are situations that you and your significant other must consider as retirement comes closer. Sure, visions of the perfect dream vacations and spontaneous trips to see the grandkids come to mind. Golf, beach, gardening and bike rides bring smiles. But how often will you do those things?
Just think about how smart and happy you will feel in retirement when you and your partner have already worked on these challenges! Perhaps you explored the opportunities for starting a new business or offering consulting in an area you know well. You’ll feel glad you made new friends in that Saturday morning photography class you signed up for two years ago and have been enjoying ever since.
The Bureau of Statistics notes that a male at 65 has, on the average, another 20 years to live and enjoy life. A female has around 22 years. Here’s one more math note: that is another 1/3 of your life
Help yourself enjoy your retirement by planning before you get there. Help your relationship with your partner by talking about and understanding each person’s wants and needs. Then,
Good Luck! Loretta
‘A’ squared plus ‘B’ squared = ‘C’ squared!
#holidays #life strategies #positivity
Here are three simple and helpful hints to make the season “Positively Fabulous!,” one of happy memories and family togetherness.
Try to rethink what you talk about. Spend more time on the good times you had; talk about something that made you laugh. In fact, try not mentioning the ‘annoying’ things that happened. I bet you’ll forget about them!
Happy Holidays!!
Now comes the big question. You are probably going to a Halloween party, so...
It’s a good idea to start planning now. Just like for Halloween, you’ll need to make some plans, decide how you want to spend your time, and then figure out how you will make it all happen. You can try on different costumes and take different paths towards the treats you so desire.
The special beauty of retirement is that you can always take off the costume if it becomes uncomfortable. Then you can change into something else!
He soon found that doing this all day every day was not really what he had in mind. So, he then cut back to going to the stables twice a week. And since he always liked writing, now he spends a lot of time writing mysteries set in the horseback riding world.
Recently, someone asked her to take photos of their son’s wedding and various other special events. That then turned into teaching photography as a continuing education course to adults at the local high school.
It all started with having a plan. That is the secret to success with most things, and it is really important in retirement. Sure, you might say you have your finances in order, but after all, retirement is about so much more than the money.
Some people facing retirement say:
- “Ah, – time to do what I want, when I want.”
- “I’m going to get up late and enjoy my coffee and the newspaper.”
- “Travel! I am going to travel!”
- “Well, I’ll probably start another company or get a paying job.”
All these sound great and interesting – on the surface. But let’s look at them more carefully.
“Ah, time to do what I want when I want.” Ok, but what do you want? And in what order do you want it? There may be a lot of choices and a lot of opportunities for you and your time. Thinking about it and planning ahead can make a huge difference and help avoid disappointment.
“I’m going to get up late and enjoy my coffee and the newspaper.” Ok, so assuming you don’t sleep later than 8:00, that brings us to around 10 a.m. Good for you! You are caught up on what is happening in the world. Now what? (And, by the way, if you’re only having coffee and you use a Keurig, you will probably be done by 9:30!)
“Travel! I am going to travel!” Yes! Plan those trips to your dream cities. And go. But remember, travel is getting harder and harder. Planes are cancelled; security causes long lines; prices are through the roof. And what if your knee starts hurting again? Just like you spend time planning the details of a trip, you need to have a plan for all those other weeks when you are not traveling!
“Well, I’ll probably start another company or get another job.” But wait, why did you retire in the first place? Will you make sure that you won’t face the difficulties and stressors that made you leave?
Don’t get me wrong – any of these are a good starting point for some real thinking and self-assessment. Being honest with yourself is a lot easier with an objective partner. A few sessions with a Retirement Coach can make all the difference.
Call me; let’s talk.
should you choose to accept it, is…”
Sometimes in life you do have choices. You can choose – even volunteer – for the mission. But sometimes the mission is simply forced on you, and then you have to navigate the challenges.
Transitions
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about TRANSITIONS. Often it’s as simple as going off to college or wanting to change jobs. Other times it’s finding yourself an empty nester, being ‘let go’ from a job, or becoming single after years of partnership. Or maybe you are moving from one place to another, just lost someone you love, or realize that you must RETIRE.
These transitions – or CHANGES – all force you to ask yourself similar questions:
- Who am I NOW?
- How will I spend my spare time?
- Which people will I surround myself with?
- How am I going to find fulfillment?
Each transition happens to a different you. It’s important to take a good look at who you are NOW. Then you can explore what you really want and make a plan for how to get there.
Coaching You Through the Transition
As a coach, I don’t give you the plan. Only you know what will make you enthused about getting up in the morning. But coaching will help you decide what you really want and what’s been stopping you from getting there. Once you are armed with that information, you’ll sharpen your focus and be ready for what lies ahead.
CHANGE – Some people can handle it just fine, and others, ‘not so much.’ Whether you are Jim (or Janet) and find that your:
- Relationship is changing;
- Lifestyle is changing;
- Attitude is changing;
- Job/place to live is changing;
- You’re getting married/Having a baby/Becoming empty nester; or
- Yikes! You’re going to Retire (!)
having a coach makes a big difference as you navigate the new environment. The “Transition Mission” is yours – and you have to choose to accept it. Let me help you make it an exciting
MISSION: POSSIBLE!
Author
Loretta Saff, M.A., CPC, CPRC
As an active writer, both nationally and internationally, Loretta Saff's humor columns, blog, and lifestyle articles reflect an insight in dealing with situations that helps people get to their core issues and encourage confidence, trust and support.
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